Zhuang Yan was really too busy and hadn’t even closed his eyes for several days.

He was even more uneasy when he thought of Xie Ning. Even if Xie Ning acted calmly, and the messages he sent were nothing unusual, Zhuang Yan still felt that something was not right.

After contacting Uncle Zhong, what Uncle Zhong said confirmed his instincts. So although he was busy, he still asked Song Qingqing to take care of Xie Ning if she had the opportunity.

Of course, he wanted to fly back to see Xie Ning as soon as possible, but he couldn’t ignore so many people who were waiting on set.

Going back was not a matter that could be settled in a day or two. At least one week must be spared. But this week’s filming plan couldn’t be delayed at all. He finished filming all that could be done in advance and delayed filming the rest.

Time was compressed very tightly. Sometimes there would be a night scene that night, followed by an early morning scene the next day.

Zhuang Yan simply spent the night on the set, shrinking into the director’s exclusive chair, and bringing over a few clothes for one night.

When filming, he was attentive and full of energy. When it was time to rest, his whole body seemed to fall apart, and his eyes would close in minutes just by sitting on a chair.

But his rest time was usually only ten minutes. After a nap, he would soon be woken up to shoot the next scene. His body was even more uncomfortable. His eyes were turning dry and his body felt it was better to just fall asleep.

Later, when he was resting, he would stand up and move twice, or wash his face with cold water in the bathroom to keep himself awake.

“You can’t do this.” Zhao Yang frowned. “The area under your eyes is as dark as a panda’s. You haven’t even closed your eyes for a few days.”

After washing his face, Zhuang Yan wiped his hands clean: “I’m fine.”

Zhao Yang asked: “I think you are about to pass out at any moment. How about handing over the next few scenes to the assistant director first, and you go rest?”

“No.” Zhuang Yan shook his head, “The scenes these days are more important. I don’t feel relieved if I don’t check it myself.”

Zhao Yang wanted to persuade him with a few more words, but Zhuang Yan said: “If I am not satisfied with the filming, I must go back and shoot again. Only more time and money will be wasted then.”

Zhao Yang had no choice but to say, “Okay, but don’t tire yourself out.”

Zhuang Yan waved his hand: “Don’t worry, I have a sense of measure and nothing will happen.”

Zhao Yang looked anxiously at his back, thinking that he didn’t seem to be all right at all.

After returning home to rest, then coming back, Zhuang Yan simply walked to the spot Xie Ning always stayed, as if repeating the path he had walked.

To refresh his mind, he took a cigarette out, put it between his fingers, and took two puffs, thinking about the appearance of Xie Ning.

He remembered that Xie Ning always liked to sit here and paint. Now when he sat down, he looked up and saw his exclusive chair.

Xie Ning left in a hurry and didn’t bring much luggage. The sketches he painted before were still in the hotel.

Zhuang Yan looked through it later, and most of them were pictures of what he looked like when he directed the show. He thought it was quite novel. He hadn’t seen his appearance before. It turned out that he was like this on set.

Occasionally, there were two pictures of Sheng Shisong and other actors filming. Thinking of this, Zhuang Yan couldn’t help but turn his gaze to the group of actors who were resting, staring at Sheng Shisong blankly.

His eyes quickly poked a hole in Sheng Shisong’s back, but he didn’t know what exactly he was looking at.

Sheng Shisong was watched from behind and suddenly felt cold: “Why do I feel weird.”

Luo Zixin was looking down at the script, didn’t care too much, and said, “What? Worried about being scolded by Director Zhuang later?”

When she said this, Sheng Shisong also sighed: “I don’t know what happened to Director Zhuang in the past two days, but the whole person is very irritable recently.”

Luo Zixin had a lingering fear: “Yes. His complexion has never improved, and I don’t know who or what caused him to be that way.”

Another actor next to him said: “I’m starting to miss the beauty of sister-in-law now.”

“Yes.” Luo Zixin said, “Sister-in-law hasn’t come for a few days. If he’s here, Director Zhuang’s temper would be reduced a lot.”

Everyone added sentence after sentence, and they soon began to miss the days Xie Ning was on the set.

Before they could miss him for long, another staff member came to remind them to prepare for the next scene. So each of them should get their make-up done and practice reciting the lines.

Sheng Shisong casually glanced at the place where Xie Ning usually sat and painted. He didn’t see Xie Ning but saw Zhuang Yan smoking.

He froze for a moment, then shook his head and smiled.

The doctor said that Father Xie’s condition was improving.

For Xie Ning, this was the best news he had heard recently.

But Xie Ning couldn’t truly relax his mind if he didn’t wake up.

Song Qingqing came to the hospital to see him almost every day. Sometimes she just hurriedly greeted Xie Ning before leaving, sometimes she would chat with Xie Ning casually when she had a little free time.

Most of their topics revolved around Zhuang Yan.

Xie Ning listened very carefully as if he could get a glimpse of Zhuang Yan’s life abroad from Song Qingqing’s words.

Well-known, high-spirited, difficult, and lonely.

Zhuang Yan would not mention these things when chatting with him. Regarding the memory of his student days, he was more willing to discuss matters about Xie Ning than himself.

In this way, Xie Ning could also have a lot of common topics to talk about.

Zhuang Yan was always very caring in this respect. Xie Ning didn’t like to talk most of the time. When chatting, he always keeps his eyes open and listens quietly.

But Zhuang Yan liked to tease him and guide him to speak slowly.

He and Song Qingqing had a very happy conversation, and Xia Wan was also happy to see the result.

She didn’t know what the two talked about, only to see that Song Qingqing was the only girl Xie Ning was not so repulsed at over the years.

So she was very pleased and felt that Xie Ning was slowly getting on the right track.

And Xie Ning’s condition was indeed gradually getting better. At any rate, he would not vomit completely after eating. After chatting with Song Qingqing, he would have a good sleep.

But the expression on his face became less and less different, and his eyes became less and less warm.

Uncle Zhong had a good sense of what not to do, so he stopped talking about it for several days, but finally could not hold back talking to Xie Ning.

“Young Master.” Uncle Zhong said hesitantly, “Do you…need to see a doctor?”

Xie Ning was stunned: “I am in good health recently, and I am not sick.”

Uncle Zhong said: “That’s not what I mean… how to say it, the feeling you give me now is very similar to the way you were when you first moved to the compound.”

Xie Ning was silent for a long time, then went to the bathroom to look at himself in the mirror.

In the mirror, his eyes were cast down, his clothes were clean and tidy, and his hands were on the sink. He looked very quiet.

He looked so quiet that it felt like even the largest change in the outside world could no longer interfere with him.

Xie Ning washed his face in silence and took the time to call Ji Wenbin.

“Doctor Ji.” He said, “My disease seems to have relapsed again.”

Ji Wenbin’s voice was as gentle as ever.

Xie Ning has to say that he thought Ji Wenbin was a very good psychologist, not only because it was a pleasure to chat with him, but also because he would respond to you whenever you needed him.

Even if he was awakened by the patient’s call in the middle of the night, Ji Wenbin would still respond to you gently and politely with his sleepy voice. You wouldn’t feel the slightest irritation of being disturbed from his attitude.

He would give you a sense of peace of mind that he was always there anytime, anywhere.

So even if there was no time to chat in person, Xie Ning would still make time to call him.

On the other side of the phone, Ji Wenbin said, “Can you describe the specific situation?”

Fearing waking up Father Xie, Xie Ning deliberately walked to the lounge when calling.

There was no one in the lounge at the moment, the chairs were empty, and Xie Ning did not sit down, but simply walked to the window and looked out.

From there, you could see the flow of people passing by the gate of the hospital.

His body felt dizzy for a moment, but the third floor was still within his tolerance. Xie Ning lowered his eyes and quietly looked at the flowerbeds that surrounded the building, and then slowly described his feelings to Ji Wenbin these days.

“…I don’t know how to describe this feeling.” Finally, Xie Ning said, “The whole world has become strange and boring to me.”

“My emotions have become very weak. What made me angry before has happened, but I don’t think it matters at all .”

“For a moment, I’d feel tired, not physically, but mentally… A sense of exhaustion.”

Ji Wenbin: “Did you come to contact me because you noticed the strangeness by yourself?”

Xie Ning shook his head: “In fact, I have never felt any change in myself. It is Uncle Zhong, my grandfather’s housekeeper, who said that the way I am now… is exactly the same as before.”

“What do you think?” Ji Wenbin asked, “Do you feel that your current mentality is the same as that of the past?”

Xie Ning was silent for a while and said, “I don’t know.”

“Sometimes, I don’t remember my original feelings. It’s as if they are but very distant things. The past is like a dream to me. I can remember the gist of what happened, but I can’t recall the actual feeling of being in the dream.”

Ji Wenbin smiled: “This is a good thing, it shows that you are gradually breaking away from the influence of the past.”

“Then… what’s wrong with me now…?” Xie Ning asked.

Ji Wenbin thought for a while and said, “Your grandfather’s illness was not something you could prepare for beforehand, so you were caught off guard and your emotions fell into a long-term loss.”

Xie Ning replied: “Yeah.”

Ji Wenbin also said: “This is normal. People’s emotions will always fluctuate due to changes in the outside world. You have been in a bad mood during this period. It is not certain that your illness has relapsed.”

In fact, whether Xie Ning ever suffered from emotional apathy, was still a big question mark.

“Is that so?” Xie Ning was at a loss for a moment.

Ji Wenbin changed his statement: “You don’t have a psychological problem. Don’t make your own conclusions easily.”

“But…” Xie Ning’s eyelashes cast a shadow on his cheeks, covering his eyes, “I feel indifferent to everything now. It feels like everything doesn’t matter.”

Ji Wenbin paused: “Are there no exceptions?”

Xie Ning fell into silence.

“Life is always full of light and love.” Ji Wenbin said persuasively, “Is there such an existence that makes you feel that life is warm and beautiful? Just thinking of them can make you laugh unconsciously.”

“You can be indifferent but not to him. It may be very light and small, but that person has left such a trace in your heart.”

The weather was very good today, and sunlight came in from outside the window, hitting Xie Ning’s body, and casting a long shadow on the ground.

Xie Ning was soaked in the sun for a long time, his eyelashes quivered twice, and his hand slightly lifted, holding the edge of the window sill.

“Zhuang Yan.” He uttered a name gently, and the corners of his lips twitched.

Xie Ning smiled unconsciously.

“What?” Ji Wenbin asked as if he didn’t hear clearly.

Xie Ning pressed against the window sill, and his tone became lighter: “I said, yes.”

That person, just saying his name, made his emotions move little by little.

It seems that he lit up his world and made his life colorful, vivid, and interesting.

“Thank you, Doctor Ji, I think I…”

Halfway through the conversation, he looked down and paused when he saw a familiar figure at the back.

The man was tall, dressed in a black coat, with his hands in his pockets, and was walking forward with his head down. After a few staggering steps, the figure disappeared from the crowd.

Xie Ning was stunned for several seconds, and suddenly forgot what he was trying to say.

Looking out, there were people coming and going at the door of the building, but he didn’t see anyone he knew well.

Seeing him stop abruptly, Ji Wenbin couldn’t help asking, “What’s wrong?”

Xie Ning rubbed his eyes, then dropped his gaze after a long while. He said faintly: “It’s nothing, my eyes were just a little blinded from the sun.”

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