I and My Husband Sleep in a Coffin

When I told my husband to go buy a bag of salt and he brought back a wild human, the kind that was covered in blood, my inner imagination goes…

Wang Xiao Mie was wearing a blue apron and holding a wooden spatula as he stood at the door staring unblinkingly at Wen Feng Jin carrying in the large lump.

Wang Xiao Mie: ‘Um, good job, it’s still bleeding and looks fresh, should be ready to be slaughtered.’

AHHHH!

Wang Xiao Mie held the wooden spatula and almost fainted!

H, h, h, he’s d, d, d, dead!!!!

He stared in horror as Wen Feng Jin dropped the package on the ground with a puff.

Wang Xiao Mie was even more shocked when the lump began to move.

Oh sh*t! It’s still alive!!!

Wang Xiao Mie quickly threw away the wooden spatula. He squatted down and poked at the bloody gourd-like bulge with shaking fingers.

“Wu… stop poking…” The man raised his hand strenuously.

“Oh! Sorry, sorry! Does it hurt a lot? Ambulance! Ambulance! Feng Jin, call the ambulance! So much blood! … Brother, you’re quite sturdy.” Wang Xiao Mie immediately withdrew his finger and frantically reached for his cellphone in the apron pocket.

But before he made the call, he suddenly thought of something.

“Um… Feng Jin…” Wang Xiao Mie watched as Wen Feng Jin pulled out a piece of tissue and wiped his bloodstained hands with indifference. He swallowed his saliva and said, “He wasn’t beaten up by you, was he?”

“If the police were to come…” They won’t have to waste time finding the killer.

“No.” Wen Feng Jin said, “I only picked him up.” He then reached into his pocket and showed something to Wang Xiao Mie.

On a closer look, Wang Xiao Mie saw that it was a pocketbook flipped to a certain page. On it was a crooked line of words in very unsightly handwriting.

[Guide to become a good man: Help the injured]

It was Wang Xiao Mie’s handwritten ‘Samaritan Guidelines’ for Wen Feng Jin.

Wang Xiao Mie kept staring at the small pocketbook in his hand until Wen Feng Jin also squatted down to his eye level and a bitter medicinal fragrance drifted to his nose.

He said, “I listened to you and saved him.”

He could not put it into words but Wang Xiao Mie looked at Wen Feng Jin’s expressionless face and wanted to give the devil’s head a good rub.

And he did put this thought into action. 

Wang Xiao Mie placed his hand on Wen Feng Jin’s head and rubbed it back and forth. 

He even said, “Yo xi ~ yo xi ~” You’re such a good boy! En!!!”

(TN: It’s to imitate the Japanese word ‘yoshi’, not sure if that’s how it’s spelled and it’s not the dragon in Mario. The word means good job or well done, it’s pretty commonly heard in anime.)

Wang Xiao Mie’s paws froze once he realized what he had done. Did he just treat Wen Feng Jin like a puppy?!!!

Just as he thought that Wen Feng Jin would get angry and shove his hand away..

Wen Feng Jin smiled.

It was a subtle hook of the lips, like a stubborn kid who was feeling proud of being praised but did not want others to see his happiness.

As if space and time were in disarray, Wang Xiao Mie once again saw the coquettish teenager from that year who would jump into his arms after class.

The paws moved again but this time, it was stroking the sleek silver hair gently. 

He whispered softly, “Well done, Xiao Wen Zi.”

Boss Wen: ￣へ￣

Wen Feng Jin pursed his lips and tried to stay indifferent.

Wang Xiao Mie patted his head and tried to conceal his laughter.

After giving the wolf the reward it had anticipated, Wang Xiao Mie turned to flip the man over. He went to the kitchen and came back with a basin of water to wipe the blood off his body.

The blooming flowers above Wen Feng Jin’s head disappeared at once. He stared coldly at the man on the ground then went to pick up the bag of salt. He said in an icy tone, “Let’s ignore him first, I’ve already fed him blood. Xiao Mie, I want to drink soup.”

Wang Xiao Mie: “…”

Hearing such inhuman words, the body on the ground moaned louder and began to wiggle.

Wang Xiao Mie was startled and quickly turned to look at him.

“Make another sound and I will kick you out,” Wen Feng Jin said heartlessly.

The groans immediately turned into whimpers.

The big brother on the ground clearly demonstrated what it was like to be both scared and angry.

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“Alright,” Wen Feng Jin looked at the man and nodded in satisfaction. He turned to look at Wang Xiao Mie with a smile plastered on the ice-cold face, “Xiao Mie, I want soup.”

There was a tenderness under the icy appearance, and in that tender was a slight coyness.

After failing to wipe the thick and dried blood stains on the man, Wang Xiao Mie gave up and sighed. He confirmed that the man’s wounds were healed by Wen Feng Jin’s blood before asking Wen Feng Jin to put him in a bathtub and soak him in warm water, hoping to rinse off the bloodstains.

And then?

And then Wang Xiao Mie picked up the spatula and went back to frying his vegetables and making his soup …

What about the patient? Let’s just stew him first… Ah, no, it should be let him soak in warm water first.

But after considering that the man might be too weak to support himself and to prevent a drowning accident in his bathtub, Wang Xiao Mie locked Wen Feng Jin inside the bathroom to watch over him.

“Keep an eye on him for a while, I’m going back to cook.”

As the door closed and the humming sound faded, Boss Wen’s smile disappeared. He turned and gave the man an icy stare.

The man: …. Huhuu I’m so scared!

Half an hour later, Wang Xiao Mie had finished making dinner and went to inform them. It was then that the man’s face popped out of the water and became visible after all the blood and dirt had been cleaned off.

Wang Xiao Mie’s eyes widened, “It’s you! The stalker!”

The man who had come back to life uttered a ‘thank you’ and nodded awkwardly.

Wang Xiao Mie wondered if this was actually why Wen Feng Jin was willing to save him.

Wen Feng Jin on the other hand obviously did not think much of this man. He went into the kitchen and began bringing out the dishes. Once the man saw that Wen Feng Jin was glancing his way with menacing eyes, he shivered and stood up stiffly.

“Let me help you carry that!”

At the dinner table, Wen Feng Jin was eating his soup gracefully with a spoon while the man was looking at the dishes on the table with the eyes of someone who had not eaten for eight hundred years.

From the beginning, Wen Feng Jin had no intention of letting the man stay, much less serve him food. In his opinion, he had fulfilled the guideline written in the pocketbook, there was no need to keep the man any longer.

“Those dishes were made for me,” Wen Feng Jin said. His eyes were ferocious, like a wolf protecting its food.

“We’re all acquaintances here, it’s just another pair of chopsticks…” Wang Xiao Mie scratched his head looking at the man salivating over the food on the table. His clothes were no longer wearable and Wang Xiao Mie had to lend him one of his bathrobes.

“Let’s just keep him for dinner, is that ok?”

Wen Feng Jin had his arms crossed and exhaled a puff of cold air. He then went into the kitchen and came back with a bowl. He placed the bowl on the floor and said, “Then let him eat here.”

Wang Xiao Mie: “…” What kind of monster are you?!

Blue veins were popping out from Wang Xiao Mie’s forehead. He grabbed the bowl and placed it on the table.

“He’s eating here!” See how you’ve bullied him!

At last, the three ate at the same table. Wen Feng Jin completely ignored the man while Wang Xiao Mie looked at him chomping down the food like it was some high-class delicacies, making him feel like a great chef himself.

The way he ate looked too appetizing.

While eating, Wang Xiao Mie secretly observed the man’s appearance. The times that they had met before, the man was fully cloaked or had his head in the trash. After Wen Feng Jin rescued him, he was covered in dirt and so Wang Xiao Mie had always thought that that was why he could not see the man’s face. But now he realized, that was not the case at all. It was because the man was too dark…

In order words, his skin was black, truly black. And it was not the black color of our international friends but more like a naturally born dark skin with added tanning of ten to fifteen days.

Wang Xiao Mie raised his line of sight and stared down the man’s neck. Ai ya, my god, from his neck down it was still the same color.

‘Other than our international friends, it seems we also have people who could be born with this naturally dark skin. Incredible!’ Wang Xiao Mie thought silently.

Wen Feng Jin was flaring when saw this scene. With very judgemental eyes, he scanned the man up and down.

‘En, not as good-looking as me.’

Wen Feng Jin rested his heart and continued to drink his soup. 

‘But still, even if he’s ugly, Shixiong can only look at me!’

Tasting a slight sourness in his mouth, Wen Feng Jin sneaked one hand under the table and lightly sent a force forward …

The voracious diner suddenly felt like he was being trampled by an elephant! His eyes were almost popping out and he coughed violently!

Wang Xiao Mie immediately poured him a bowl of soup. “Drink this. What’s the hurry, eat slowly. We still have plenty.”

“Thank you, thank you.” Although he did not know where the sudden pain came from, he looked at Wang Xiao Mie’s kind eyes and was moved to tears. “You’re a really good person, hix hix.”

“Heh heh.” Wang Xiao Mie rubbed his nose tip with embarrassment, “It’s nothing, go on, drink it.”

“Umm!!”

“…” Wen Feng Jin took his hand back and stared at the bowl of soup the man was holding. Since then, the blacklisted cellphone in his heart had finally welcomed another friend

…..

After dinner, the dark-skinned man took the initiative to wash and wipe dry the dishes and also cleaned the table.

He then cautiously sat on the sofa holding a cup of tea that Wang Xiao Mie had brewed. He timidly glanced at Wen Feng Jin who was giving him a disturbingly cold look.

“Tell us,” Wang Xiao Mie was sitting opposite of him, “What happened to you? How did you end up in the alleyway like that?”

The dark-skinned man blinked and showed the sharp contrast between black and white with his eyes. He spoke softly, “Thank you for your help. I, I’m… my name is Baiyu.” 

(TN: Baiyu (白玉) means white jade)

“Pffft!” 

Wang Xiao Mie covered his mouth and tried to suppress his laughter so hard that his whole body was shaking, “S, sorry, please continue…”

Baiyu: ‘I know my skin and name are like antonyms but please give me some respect!’

The black ball Baiyu widened his eyes but shrunk back after he caught a glimpse of Wen Feng Jin staring at him.

“Actually, I’m just a fresh graduate… What I said last time about being a disciple and all that was just a bluff… I learned those from a picture book left behind by my grandfather. I’ve only started delving into these strange crafts and facing you that day was also my very first time putting it into practice…”

‘Did we happen to be his first opponent?’ Wang Xiao Mie was not sure who the more unfortunate one was.