I [Imperial] Am Not This Kind of Man

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Last edited 12/10/20.

On one late summer night, a rare refreshing time, a slight breeze swept away the blazing heat of the day.

Qin Nuo sat on the winding corridor by Xi Yue Lake. Lazily reclining against the railing, he was nodding off to sleep.

Suddenly, there was the sound of light footsteps approaching and a sweet floral fragrance . A graceful, touching mutter traveled to his ears, “Your Highness, how can you fall asleep here again? Near the end of summer, the autumn winds gradually rise. The nights are already quite cold.”

Accompanying the quiet, soft words, a white hand slightly raised, a thin layer of silk cloth spreading open as it landed on Qin Nuo’s abdomen. At the same time, the hand mischievously moved in a caress.    
  
“It would be bad if Your Highness felt feverish again, let this lowly servant take a look.” 

The slender white hand nimbly wandered around, trying to wake up a certain unmentionable thing. 

Occasionally there are palace workers passing by this corridor and look at them from afar. With romantic surroundings and a beauty in his embrace, it was a very charming scene.   

Qin Nuo slightly shifted his body.

Thinking that he had a reaction, the beauty was secretly delighted. She immediately stuck closer to him with more unbridled passion, hating that she could not drape herself on Qin Nuo’s figure. 

The palace workers who passed by lowered their heads one by one. However, they couldn’t resist peeking towards this side. This Ninth Highness was too much! To go this far in broad daylight…Nowadays His Majesty is still ill, if he heard this kind of news and….. 

Just as the beauty approached closer, she didn’t expect that Qiu Nuo seemed to be completely unaware that there is another person on top of him. He stretched out, turning his body over at the same time.
 
With a gasp from the beauty hanging onto his figure, PA-TONG! She fell into the scenic Xi Yue Lake. 

A shriek rang through the air, “Ah! Save me! Someone, wuu….Save….me!!”

At this moment, the Qiu Nuo in the corridor seemed to arouse from his slumber. Opening his eyes, he looked around him wildly. “Hm? What’s that sound?”   

Several palace workers who had been passing by ran towards this side, everyone lending a hand to pull the beauty who had fallen into the water out of the lake. 

The lake was extremely deep, and quite cold. Even in the end of summer, falling into the water at night was not an enjoyable experience. As for one’s image? Don’t even mention it. The thin silk palace cloth was already soaking wet, clinging to her body. The meticulously done hairstyle had been undone by the water, messily scattered across her face. 

The Qin Nuo across from her just woke up from his dreams to see this sight. He immediately screamed, “Ahhhh! It’s a ghost!”

A few young palace workers couldn’t resist laughing. Everyone said that the Ninth Highness wasn’t very sharp. As expected, the rumors weren’t wrong! Putting aside his act of pushing away the beauty who had thrown herself into his embrace, he also made a big deal out of nothing.   

The “female ghost” reached a hand out to pull down the dark green aquatic grass on her head. She wanted to speak, but instead sneezed in succession.

“Ai yah, it’s Lü He! How did you fall into the water?” A familiar voice evoked his memory, Qin Nuo scrutinized her for a good while before recognizing his personal servant. 

“Your Highness……This lowly servant saw that Your Highness fell asleep here. Thinking that the night breeze is too cold, I had wanted to help cover Your Highness with something. Yet…” The beauty Lü He was both embarrassed and angry. Grievance filled her heart. When she finished speaking, she couldn’t resist covering her face.

Putting aside the failure of her seduction attempt, to be seen by this many people…She was afraid that it wouldn’t be long until word spread out in the whole palace. She really did not have the face to meet people!

“Then it must have been that I was half-conscious in my sleep.” Qin Nuo scratched his hair sheepishly.  “You should quickly go drink a bowl of ginger soup. It would be bad if you catch a cold.”  

Lü He let out a cry of distress, holding her face as she turned and ran away.

Qin Nuo blinked in confusion, then turned to smile at the couple of people who had helped pull Lü He up: “Thanks for your help earlier.” 

The couple palace workers currently kneeling on the ground in ceremony were overwhelmed by favor from the superior, “How could we dare to accept Your Highness’ gratitude?” 

Another person said, “Lü He that girl doesn’t know any etiquette. Your Highness bestowed upon her ginger soup, but she didn’t even express gratitude. She just ran away.”
 
“She’s all soaked, it’s hard not to be impatient.” Qin Nuo smiled indulgently, turning to walk down the long corridor.

‘This Ninth Highness didn’t seem to have realized that that dishonest girl, Lü He, had wanted to seduce him!‘ The palace workers thought. With great tacit understanding, none of them mentioned it.  

Once he was gone, the palace workers got to their feet. A young, small eunuch among them couldn’t resist saying, “No wonder they all say that the Ninth Highness has a good temperament.”

Another followed up with, “It’s a shame that he’s not that bright…….”  

“Stop right there! Is it even your place to say these kinds of things?” The oldest eunuch among them hurriedly interrupted his comrades’ conversation. “Anyways, I heard that ever since the last time Ninth Highness fell severely ill, he’s already gotten much better.”

The little eunuch also realized his mistake, changing the subject, “That Lu He, that appearance earlier is really…” 

“Heh heh, the clothes was so thin it was like there was nothing. That pair in front of the chest…”

The couple of eunuchs giggled, the last part said in a very low voice.

Qiu Nuo who had walked on ahead heaved a silent sigh. Even if the palace rules were very strict, it couldn’t stop the gossiping nature of these people! That’s right as well. To be trapped all day in the deep palace, with nothing else to ease one’s boredom, if he himself had transmigrated into a low-ranking palace worker, he might be a member of this group of gossipers as well.

Anyway, he had taken care of a troublesome matter today. With Lü He as an example, he was sure that others should now think twice before coming at him!

Don’t blame him for destroying that flower in such a way, that Lü He was truly too much. He himself as a tender grass was just thirteen years old, but she couldn’t wait to weed him. Even if she was one of the big palace girls assigned to help him understand the birds and the bees, he couldn’t stand it!

Not to mention, the him several months ago had been a bona-fide girl. If he’ was expected to do it with the Xiao Jie Jie, he still hadn’t prepared himself mentally yet!

That’s right, Qin Nuo was a transmigrator.

To think at the time, after great effort and difficulty, she had tested into a decent university. After she graduated, she entered a company with a bright future. Qin Nuo had been happily fantasizing about becoming promoted, becoming the general manager, taking up the post of CEO, and taking a tall, handsome, rich man as wife–er, she meant–marrying a tall, handsome, rich man. However, a sudden diagnosis sheet brought the grim reaper’s grievous news.

A fatal disease that current medicine was not able to cure! Her parents had long died in a car accident. A couple of relatives pooled together a couple thousands of money, they could be considered to have fulfilled the last bit of their duty. A month later, she died alone in the hospital room.

She originally thought that people died like the extinguishment of a lamp, her consciousness dim. Yet she found herself opening her eyes again in this lonely, foreign Da Zhou1 dynasty.

 Half a year had passed since her arrival into this world. She, or rather, he had gradually gotten used to these idle days.

He had become the unfavored Ninth Prince Qin Nuo. That’s right, the name was the same as the one he had in the past life, although it was unknown if there was any connection. 

The plan to marry a tall, handsome rich man became a mirage. But it didn’t seem so bad to be a tall, handsome rich man himself! Especially when he already won at the starting line the moment he opened his eyes to see the expensive heavenly decorations of royals.

Although now a man, Qin Nuo’s personality had always been calm and composed. If you can’t do anything to prevent it, then you might as well sit back and enjoy it. After a few days to adjust from the awkwardness he felt towards the psychological and physiological aspects that he now possessed, he was able to quickly adapt to his new body and circumstances.

Living the easy life with everything provided of a prince, although Qin Nuo did not have the original host’s memory, but based on her keen observation skills, she soon had a detailed understanding of the surrounding environment and her own circumstances.

The Ninth Prince Qin Nuo was exactly thirteen years old this year. His birth mother Consort Chen was born in a Jiang Nan scholarly family. She had a top-class appearance and seemed more delicate than flowers. On top of that, she possessed a good voice. As soon as she entered the palace, she became the emperor’s favorite consort. It wasn’t long until she got pregnant. It was hard to say whether she was fortunate or unfortunate, this first pregnancy was unexpectedly a pair of fraternal twins. In the ancient health care level, childbirth was like passing through the gates of the netherworld2—not to mention that it was giving birth to two at once in her first pregnancy. Thus, after Consort Chen fought to give birth to a pair of twins, she unfortunately died of extreme blood loss. She was only 18 years old when she died.  

Beautiful women suffered unfortunate deaths. The emperor really grieved for a while, but every one of the beautiful 3,000 women in his palace harem were each understanding “flowers”. The “sentimental” emperor soon put Consort Chen behind him, causing Qin Nuo this ninth prince to also become a nobody.

But in this royal harem, being a nobody was the norm.  

The current emperor of Da Zhou, Emperor Jing Yao3, had no special strengths in political and state affairs. The only kind of “affair” that he had refined eyes and excellent taste in was the women in his harem. The members of the palace harem were not only top-class beauties, each of them had unique skills. There were some who had soft physiques, proficient in bringing out the essence of dance; there were some who had suave songs, their voices shaking the skies; there are some whose poetry were so exquisite, it could be said to be unforgettable; there were some whose calligraphy and painting were so sophisticated, it was world-famous. If one was to talk about the quality of the palace harem, it was definitely the highest or second-highest among the emperors in the history of Da Zhou.

This brought another consequence. That was, there were many princes. Not counting the ones who died as infants, there were sixteen who could be arranged in order. Of course, there were even more princesses; there were twenty. 

As soon as there was an excess of princes, this honorific title becomes less valuable. So except for the Di4 born princes and those born from the consorts who were currently favored, the vast majority of the princes were nobodies. 

No matter what, he had been lucky to have transmigrated into a prince. He did not have to worry about food or drink, nor did he need to live a hard life. 

Although the history knowledge that he had learnt in school was basically useless here since it was not a certain dynasty in known history, but as a prince he 1) didn’t plan on getting involved in the x political battle for the throne and 2) did not want to engage in social change to liberate the production forces and liberate the people. Instead, he simply wished to live a leisurely and carefree life. That shouldn’t be a problem at all, right?

Xi Yue Lake was not far from the Tai Wei Palace Hall that he lived in. Walk down the corridor, follow the little stone pathway and turn at the bend, and one has reached the Main Palace Hall. 

As he entered the grand entrance, he collided head-on with an elegant, graceful youth followed by two young eunuchs who had just left from the corridor and were walking in this direction. Qin Nuo was all smiles as he called out, “Tenth Younger Brother.”

Qin Zhe had originally wanted to turn his head and act like he hadn’t seen him, but Qin Nuo had already greeted him. Therefore he could only reluctantly greet, “Ninth Older Brother.”

No matter what, it was always a pleasing sight to see a beautiful youth—even if the beautiful youth’s face was as black as a pot’s bottom. 5   

To speak of the grievances between Qin Nuo and Qin Zhe, it had to be recounted from the previous generation. Consort Chen’s life before her death had been a one-person show, the other beauties who entered the palace became the supporting roles that complemented the main lead. This included the Tenth Prince’s birth mother Virtuous Consort Ge. The Ge family was a very historic and influential family clan. Her father was a major government official, the assistant minister in the Ministry of War. She had the most prominent family background among the harem girls who entered the palace at the same time. Such a girl from a scholarly family entered the palace, yet she was ranked lower than Consort Chen whose family background was a minor government official. Naturally, Virtuous Consort Ge could not accept this from the bottom of her heart. The two women also got pregnant around the same time. The Tenth Prince was only three days younger than Qin Nuo. And at that time, the emperor was still immersed in the pain over the death of his beloved consort. As a result, when the Tenth Prince was born, he didn’t even go and take one look. Virtuous Consort Ge’s resentment towards Consort Chen grew deeper. Under her influence, Qin Ze was also full of hostility towards this brother who was older than him by three days. 

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Qin Nuo was not naturally foolish. When he was four, the two children got into an argument. Qin Ze pushed Qin Nuo down the stone steps. Qin Nuo fell on his head, then he became dim-witted and stupid. Although Qin Ze caused an accident, it wasn’t very good to beat a prince to death. So they only, under the crime of “not watching over the royal children properly,” beat the two children’s more-than-a-dozen servants to death and penalized Virtuous Consort Ge a year’s worth of allowance before considering the matter settled. However, like this, the grudge on both ends was formed.

In the inner palace of Da Zhou, princes who reached five years old, have to move away from their birth mother’s side to reside in the North Palace. As if that wasn’t bad enough, because of their close age, Qin Nuo and Qin Ze were again arranged to live in a palace together.
 
Tai Wei Palace did not have a lot of room. Qin Nuo was older, so he occupied the East Wing. The East Wing had beautiful scenery; it was warm in the winter and cool in the summer. Qin Ze, on the other hand, extremely grievously moved into the West Wing. From then on, their chaotic lives began.

A child without a mother had no background. Even if he did have a background, Consort Chen was no match to the amount of influence and authority that the current Virtuous Consort Ge wielded as assistant manager of the rear palace and palace harem. So, these couple of years Qin Nuo had suffered a lot. Yet on the surface, Virtuous Consort Ge will definitely not expose any flaws that can be caught and used against her—not to mention that Qin Nuo was a dim-witted one. Even if he experienced any difficulties, he had no way to express it.

And as the two grew older, Qin Ze was intelligent and good at learning, standing out as a person of extreme talent even among the numerous princes. On the other hand, Qin Nuo conducted himself clumsily, his homework a total mess, much less receiving any imperial affection or praise. So in the two boys’ relationship, Qin Nuo was in a disadvantageous position. 

Observing Qin Nuo’s carefree and leisurely appearance, Qin Ze sneered. He blurted, “I just saw Lü He cut a sorry figure as she hurried back. Could it be that she had offended Ninth Brother?”

Ai, this good tenth younger brother of his. He did have the methods and strategies, but he was still too young and immature. Or rather, because the other is a foolish person, he didn’t even bother investing a lot of effort in his schemes.

“We did indeed have a dispute. Tonight Lü He came to find me, saying that she fell in love with Tenth Brother, you, at first sight. And she wanted to be transferred to your side. I couldn’t resist scolding her a few words, not expecting her to cry that if I didn’t let her come to—Tenth Younger Brother—your side, she would jump into the water….” Qin Nuo docilely confessed.

Qin Ze’s complexion changed, “Ninth Brother is joking with me, right?”

“Of course…” Qin Nuo rushed up, his arm wrapping around Qin Ze’s neck in one move. “I’m joking with you.”

Even though Qin Ze had seen through his intentions, he hadn’t been able to dodge quickly enough. Thus, he got caught head-on into a headlock. As he felt that iron vice-like grip, his complexion began to turn very red.

“Let me go!” This hateful dimwit couldn’t do his homework, but his strength was surprisingly strong.

“What’s wrong with us brothers being a little close?” Qin Nuo tightened his hold, sweeping a glance over the couple of servants behind Qin Ze. After confirming that these people didn’t dare to approach, he lowered his voice and spoke by Qin Ze’s ears.

 “Although…I’ve heard the people around me say that Lü He really likes you. Otherwise, why would she run over to your place all the time?”

Qin Ze’s pupils constricted, quickly regaining his composure, “I don’t understand what Ninth Older Brother is saying. It’s a mere servant. Who would pay attention to these details?” 

Qin Nuo “heh heh”ed, laughing twice.

Before he could open his mouth, Qin Ze reminded him, “Ninth Older Brother, you better go back to get ready. Don’t forget that tonight we still have to attend upon our ill Father Emperor.”

Like awakening from a dream, Qin Nuo loosened his hold on Qin Ze. He said, “Ai yah! We’d better go back and eat then. Attending our Father Emperor in his sickness will take the whole night, you know? Tenth Brother, you better not forget to eat more!”

Afterwards, he turned to walk towards the East Palace Hall, leaving Qin Ze behind him. Qin Ze gave a cold snort, swinging his sleeve as he left.

Middle-school syndrome teenagers were just this troublesome!

Qin Nuo sighed. He knew that the reason why Lü He would be so eager to climb the bed must have been because she had done so under someone’s direction. Otherwise, why would she choose to publicly act in a hallway where people are passing? Did she still want any face?

Lü He was a palace girl dispatched to Qin Nuo’s side last month. According to the court rules of the Da Zhou, the princes were each assigned a slightly older beautiful palace girl after they are thirteen years old. These palace girls were to act as a teaching momo, er, jiejie who knew about human interrelations. This was to prevent the majority of princes from producing any bad incidents due to their young age and ignorance. After all, in regards to love, desire, this kind of thing, blocking was not as good as dredging. Before the royal wedding, these palace girls will be taken back, and dispatched to other posts lest they—by virtue of favor—cause stress and annoyance for the future Prince Consort.

Which was to say, Lü He was under imperial decree to climb the bed!

But a few days after Lü He was dispatched, the news came that the emperor was ill. 

So this matter of arranging the accompaniment was delayed for an unknown period. Since the Da Zhou was a place that pays particular attention to etiquette, there was really no way to explain yourself if you pulled a palace girl to engage in wanton pleasures in broad daylight while your old man was extremely ill.

And that was what Qin Ze was aiming for, hence the order for Lü He to seduce him in public under broad daylight. Whether anything happened or not, as long as such rumors spread, his impression in the hearts of the public would drop a lot further. 

To be honest, there was really no need. He himself had already fallen far behind, yet the other (QZ) acted like his heart wouldn’t be content unless he trampled on him (QN) a couple of times. What kind of mentality is this?!

Footnotes

Da Zhou = Great Zhougui men guan, 鬼门关 – this is the mythological gate of hell which ghosts and people near death would visit. This gate is the entrance to the netherworld. Pregnant women during labor are said to visit this place because they could either die and go through the entrance or survive and come back to the world of the living.This is his title, not his name. Each emperor has a emperor name and name for the time period that they rule forDi – children born from the main wife–in this case, the empressNot literally, this just means that Qin Zhe’s expression was unpleasant.