No, It was My Fault for Loving You

Chapter 3 : Edgar’s Visit

“How are you feeling? Atrie.”

At the sound of a voice giving permission to enter the room, the door opened and a familiar face appeared.

“Edgar-sama. It’s been a long time. I’m glad you came to see me.”

“It’s been a long time, huh? That’s a funny thing to say, Atrie. We just met the day before yesterday.”

In her previous life, she hadn’t seen Edgar since he left to study abroad about seven years ago.

She held herself back as she felt her true feelings overflowing.

“Well, I’m glad you missed me so much.”

Edgar shrugs his shoulders in a cheerful mischievous manner, causing her to let out a relieved laugh.

“…right.”

“Eh?”

“That’s right. I’ve missed you so much, Edgar-sama.”

Wasn’t it because she hasn’t seen him for over seven years?

She replied in a joking manner, mixed with her true feelings.

“…Edgar-sama?”

He stopped moving for some reason, so she tilted her head and called his name.

“…no. Nothing, it’s nothing.”

He was smart and kind, but he would freeze like this from time to time.

As a person who only cares about learning, she was sure he was still thinking about something difficult in his head.

Unlike herself and Leopold, who were of the same age, Edgar is two years older than Beatrice and the others.

But this year, he would suddenly leave the academy to study in a neighboring country without waiting for graduation.

Today, he came to inform her.

In her life before the time went back, she had to listen to the sudden announcement that he was going to study in a neighboring country, which sounded somewhat unrealistic. 

“Atrie. Don’t… be too casual about saying you missed me like that.”

Edgar put his fist to his mouth and coughed a few times, but when he turned to face her, he suddenly said something like that.

Beatrice tilted her head.

She doesn’t know what he meant when he described it as casual.

She really, really wanted to see Edgar, and she was happy to see him, so she just said so. That’s all.

But right now, she’s more concerned about the blush on Edgar’s face.

Edgar is slender, but strong.

He’s never caught a cold, but that doesn’t mean he shouldn’t be careful.

Beatrice gently reached out and touched Edgar’s cheek.

Edgar’s shoulder jolted.

“Edgar-sama. You’re not feeling well, are you? Your face is a little red.”

“…”

“Edgar-sama.”

Again.

Again, Edgar froze.

This has always been an occasional occurrence, so I’m not surprised now.

Edgar weakly glanced at Beatrice, who raised her eyebrows.

“Ah, that, Atrie. I’m fine. You should be worried about yourself. You just collapsed two weeks ago, you know.”

With that, he gently removed Beatrice’s hand from his cheek.

As for Beatrice, he was a childhood friend whom she had finally met again.

She was so overwhelmed with nostalgia that she kept a closer distance than usual, but of course Edgar didn’t know about that.

“You couldn’t get up for two days before, you know? Even if you’re feeling better now, don’t let your guard down too much.”

As Edgar spoke, he gently placed Beatrice’s removed hand back beside the bed.

“If anything happens to you, everyone will be sad. Your family, me…even Leo.”

Leopold, sama.

Beatrice bowed her head when she heard that name.

That, I wonder.

That person will meet Natalia at the academy.

And he will be blinded by nothing but Natalia.

That’s why.

That’s why at that time.

I wanted to do something for those two.

“…Atrie?”

At the sound of a doubtful voice, she came back to herself.

Then she smiled hurriedly.

“Thank you for always worrying about me, Edgar-sama. It’s very reassuring and…I’m glad.”

For some reason, Edgar looked surprised at the words she had just uttered. But she meant what she said.

Edgar had always cared for Beatrice and taken good care of her. It was as if she was his real sister.

Beatrice was also very fond of Edgar.

Although in the end, she could only communicate with him through letters as he never came back from his study abroad.

“Atrie. I need to talk to you.”

Edgar turned to Beatrice with a serious look on his face.

But Beatrice already knew the words he was about to say.

“I’m going to study in Driester this spring. I want to practice medicine in that country.”

“…that, I see.”

That’s right.

In less than a week, you’ll be leaving for a neighboring country.

And won’t be coming back.

At least for seven years.

“There’s a disease I want to study. I really want to make a cure for it. With the level of medicine in Driester, I can develop it faster than in this country. It will probably take nearly ten years, though.”

“…yes.”

“I can’t be there for you anymore, but please take care of yourself.”

Beatrice felt an inexplicable loneliness in those sea-blue eyes as she gently looked into them.

Even though she was finally able to go back in time to meet him, this reliable childhood friend would be leaving for a neighboring country in a week.

Then she would not see him again for at least seven years.

Even if she prevented Natalia’s murderous act in this life, seven years from now, Beatrice will still be dying from her illness.

If that’s the case, maybe she will never see Edgar ever again.

Unknowingly, Beatrice’s eyebrows lowered miserably.

When Edgar noticed such a trivial change in her expression, he silently tilted his head in concern.

“…you’re leaving. I’m going to miss you very much.”

“Eh?”

“But I won’t tell you not to go. It would just be too selfish of me.”

Edgar’s eyes blinked in surprise as her true feelings spilled out.

When Beatrice came back to herself, she panicked and held her mouth, but she couldn’t pretend that she hadn’t said what she said.

“I-I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I just…”

“Atrie…”

“I didn’t mean to dissuade you from your honorable intentions of leaving for a neighboring country, Edgar-sama…”

No matter how weak her heart was, she could not say anything that would affect Edgar’s future.

Tears slowly came out of her eyes, and she hurriedly wiped them away.

Embarrassed and ashamed, Beatrice looked down, unable to look at Edgar’s face.

“Atrie. I’m…”

“I’m sorry for being so pathetic. Edgar-sama, I’m really rooting for you to go and study in Driester. Please take care of yourself.”

She already ruined Leopold and Natalia’s lives in the past. She was fortunate to be able to come back to the past, but she couldn’t let herself get in Edgar’s way this time around.

Beatrice, knowing it was impolite, interrupted Edgar and ended the conversation with a deep bow of her head.