No, It was My Fault for Loving You

Chapter 6

Chapter 6 : Pre-Admission Day

How should I treat Natalia?

Beatrice thought about that as she prepared for tomorrow’s entrance ceremony.

If it was the same as before her rebirth, they would be in class together.

Inevitably, they will see each other every day.

Last time, it was Natalia who took Beatrice to the infirmary when she got sick during the ceremony.

This led to an immediate rapport between the two.

“…it’s difficult not to get involved in such a small classroom. Alejandro will probably be in the same class. I wonder if we can keep our relationship casual.”

She was often absent and had no one that she could call a friend except for Natalia and Alaejandro.

The lovely Natalia.

She is innocent, cheerful, and slightly prone to tears.

She made a good pair with the willful and cynical Alejandro.

After Natalia fell in love with Leopold, she did not spend much time with Alejandro, but he did not seem to mind and still remained aloof.

And Natalia became more beautiful day by day, like a bud blooming into a flower.

Next to Leopold, Natalia always laughed happily, and Leopold protected and cherished her as if she was a princess.

That happy scene, which seemed to last forever, began to fade near the end of their third year.

—— “they’ll never get together no matter what you do or don’t do.”

Alejandro, who said that, was probably just making a simple prediction about the marriage of those two.

But, being the clever little guy that she was, she proposed a contractual marriage to Leopoldo.

While satisfying her own love, she was intoxicated by her tender self that acted for the sake of her friend, and then she sold her favor to her loved one, which was the worst thing she could have done.

In a few years, after they were tied up together, she started whispering these to them.

—— “It’s all right. I was diagnosed with only a few years to live.”

—— “If you enter as the second wife after I die, then you won’t be ridiculed for your family status.”

—— “You can help fund the Reinalpha family by marrying me.”

—— “You don’t have to love me. You can take me as your wife, even if it’s only on paper.”

—— “Therefore, you see…?”

Ahh.

Dirty.

Dirty tricks.

She fulfilled her love by pretending to help the Marquis Reinalfa, who was struggling with money, and Natalia, who has low status.

The dirtiest thing is me.

I, who loved that man.

What kind of face did I make as I smiled in front of Natalia, who was anxious but still waiting for the day she and Leopoldo would be together?

To Natalia, who has passed the marriageable age and reached the age when she was ridiculed for delaying her marriage, but still had to resign herself to a position where she did not even have a fiancé.

Then when word of a cure from a neighboring country reached Natalia’s ears, she was already exhausted.

No wonder.

That’s why I was killed.

I deserved to be hated and killed.

“No. I can’t let Natalia look at me like that again.”

She wanted to make them happy in return for giving her a bit of happiness. This was true.

But, if she’s the one who would end up ruining Natalia and Leopold’s destiny, then it’s better for her to stay away from them more than necessary.

Natalia’s crying face remains etched in her eyes, with a mixture of nostalgic memories of her school days, the pain she felt through herself, and the mixed cries of the others.

All these things go round and round in Beatrice’s head.

Keeping a distance as a mere classmate was probably the best option for Natalia, Beatrice, and of course Leopoldo, Beatrice concluded.

“…I’m sure the two of you will meet somewhere without me.”

To begin with, the two met through Beatrice.

If so, would distancing herself from Natalia raise the possibility that the two of them would never meet? After thinking about it for a moment, Beatrice thought, no, surely that would not be the case.

Although they are in different buildings, they are still in the same school.

Sooner or later they will meet somewhere.

Maybe like before, they will get to know each other during the mock battle observation, or they might pass each other in the courtyard or schoolyard. They might even have a chance to meet each other by chance from an acquaintance other than Beatrice.

And surely those two will fall in love again in an instant.

That’s right.

I’d better not stick around.

Because I tried to help my doomed love in a mischievous way.

Therefore I was punished.

This time, she will quietly watch from afar. She will do nothing. She will not help. She will not interfere. That’s all right. Surely, that’s for the best.

That day, their future was closed in despair, and her own life ended a short while later, simply because she had conceitedly thought that she could do something about their situation.

—— “Do you want to interfere with them, or do you want to support them?”

She remembered Alejandro’s dismayed look towards her now, and chuckled.

He seemed to be smiling with a friendly smile, but in fact, in the depth of his eyes, there was a hint of mockery towards Beatrice, she can see it now.

She didn’t even notice it at that time, though.

You were right, Alejandro.

I should have taken your words more seriously at the time.

I think I finally understand what you meant now.

In the end, it was just self-satisfaction.

She thought she was supporting their love, but as it turned out, she was no help at all.

From the beginning to the end, she was, and her thoughts were, nothing but a hindrance to the both of them.

“But this time it’s okay. Because…”

I already stopped chasing after Leopold-sama.

I won’t seek him out anymore.

I won’t look for him.

I no longer desire to be loved by him.