Royal Secret: I'm a Princess!

359 COMMANDER YOAN'S CONFESSION (2)

"DO YOU really want me to answer that question, Neoma?"

Did Neoma really want to know if her previous self still chose to love Rubin Drayton in the end?

Heck no.

She thought she would be tempted to know the answer, but she was wrong. To her surprise, her heart and mind agreed that she didn't need to know about her past self's love affair.

"No, don't answer my question," Neoma told Ruto firmly. "Who "Neoma Quinzel" loved in the past has nothing to do with me."

Ruto tilted his head to one side as if he was waiting for an explanation because he didn't get what she just said.

"Neoma Quinzel was a sad person," she said in a gentle voice. "Even if she ended up loving Rubin Drayton, the bastard who hurt her, I couldn't blame her. Neoma Quinzel was deprived of love, and Rubin Drayton was the first person who paid attention to her, except for Duke Quinzel. Of course, she'd get attached to him. That's how it is for victims of domestic abuse."

"But "Neoma Quinzel" knew that Rubin Drayton was insincere with her from the start."

"That's why first love is scary, Ruto," she said while laughing softly. "To be honest with you, when I met Rubin Drayton for the first time after I regressed, my heart almost wavered. I don't want to say this, but his face is really the best–"

She stopped herself from gushing about Rubin Drayton's handsome face when she noticed Ruto was already frowning.

"Anyway, Rubin Drayton is my first love," she said defensively. "I will respect Neoma Quinzel's feelings. I won't call her stupid for falling for the same man who hurt and almost killed her. It's pathetic, but that's the power of first love."

"Then what could beat first love?"

"Last love?"

He laughed softly. "The candidates to be your last love should work hard. Rubin Drayton is dangerous because his face is totally your type."

She just laughed it off because she could tell Ruto was just joking.

Of course, she wouldn't deny that she was a sucker for good-looking people. But if that was all it took for her heart to waver, then she would have fallen in love with Rubin Drayton again. After all, even after her regression, Rubin Drayton was still the most handsome person in her eye after Papa Boss and Nero.

She was speaking objectively, of course.

"I don't like Neoma Quinzel's love life, so let's not talk about it," she said, then she turned to Ruto again. "Why did you do that to my appa? I'm talking about Gavin Quinzel."

"Because he's annoying."

"What?"

"Gavin Quinzel is annoying," he said firmly this time. "I had to trap him in a block of ice to get him out of my way."

"Ruto, you're making me upset."

"That doesn't change the fact that Gavin Quinzel is a hindrance," he said unapologetically. "His aim was to bring you back to Korea."

Her eyes widened in shock.

She remembered her appa told her about going back to Korea. Apparently, her and her appa's physical bodies were currently on a comatose state.

"Ruto, you also know about that?"

"I told you– I serve the Sun Goddess," he said. "She orders me around. But of course, I don't follow her blindly. I always demand a detailed explanation before I move. That's how I squeeze information from her and Sienna."

"Tsk," she said, clicking her tongue again. "I don't like it when you mention the Sun Priestess's name so familiar."

"I don't like it when you gush about Rubin Drayton's handsome face."

Her conscience pricked her.

"Touché."

He smiled as if he was satisfied that she admitted that. "Knowledge is power, ignorance is bliss. Choose one, Neoma."

She raised her hands and clenched them tightly. "Knowledge is power."

"The real Nabi's soul is still "alive.""

She almost choked on her saliva again. "Nabi? The real child of Go Areum, my eomma?"

"Correct."

"And how did you know that, Ruto?"

"Do you remember how old you were when you retrieved the memories of your past life after your regression?"

She nodded. "Nero and I were three years old then."

"It was because you were three years old when your soul returned to this world."

"Then who occupied my body while I wasn't…" she trailed off, then she covered her mouth with her hands when she gasped. "Don't tell me it was Nabi?"

"Gavin Quinzel didn't care about you and Lady Mona Roseheart when you and your mother crossed over to the other world," he explained to her. "He just wanted to stop Lady Mona Roseheart from possessing Go Areum's body. He also didn't want you to possess Nabi's body. But it was already too late when he arrived. Since your soul is more powerful than Nabi's, you easily possessed her and kicked her soul out of her own body."

She suddenly felt guilty. "Oh."

"I can't tell you the details because it was a plan orchestrated by the Sun Goddess, but when you took over Nabi's body, we put Nabi's soul in your physical body," he explained. "In short, you switched places. While you were in Korea living your second life, Nabi's soul was stuck in baby Neoma de Moonasterio's body."

She figured that much.

But her head hurt from calculating, so she just asked Ruto instead.

"Correct me if I'm wrong, Ruto," she said. "But you're saying my second life exists at the same time this world does. But I've lived in Korea for more than twenty years. And while I'm there for over two decades, only three years have passed in this world?"

"Time flows differently in two different worlds."

"Ah, right," she said when she remembered hearing that from someone else before. "The Moon Priest said the same thing when he took Tteokbokki."

"It's difficult to find a door that leads to another world, let alone open it," he continued his explanation. "In this world, it took us three years before we found and opened one to bring you back here."

It was amazing how only three years had passed in this world, but she spent over two decades in Korea back then.

"What happened to Nabi's soul after I returned here?"

"I brought Nabi's soul to Elen– the garden where the Cosmic Tree lives."

She froze when she realized something.

To be honest, the situation wasn't appropriate. But a meme seriously popped up in her head at the moment.

"I've connected the dots, Ruto."

"Huh?"

"When I saved my mage unnie who was trapped in the Hisa Tree, I got lost for a moment," she explained. "I was led to a garden that turned out to be where the Cosmic Tree lives. There, I met a soul who looks like me. That was Nabi, wasn't it?"

"The possibility is high," he said, then he knitted his eyebrows. "But Neoma, no one could enter Elen by getting lost. If it was that easy to see the Cosmic Tree, then most people or beings would have already met the Cosmic Tree."

"Tteokbokki said I got lost because I didn't concentrate enough on our destination."

"I believe more in fateful encounters than co-incidences."

She couldn't help but laugh. "Ruto, you sound like a male lead in a romance series."

He just smiled at her remark. "Neoma?"

"Yeah?"

"I'm sorry."

"Sorry for what?"

"We promised Nabi that we'll bring her back to her world once her job is done."

She froze when she heard that.

"That's why I said Gavin Quinzel is a hindrance," he continued. "Gavin Quinzel intends to bring you back to Korea, but that place belongs to Nabi. I had to trap Gavin Quinzel in that block of ice to stop his plan."

Okay, Ruto didn't say anything wrong.

But she was still hurt by the way he said it.

"Ah, sorry," he said while scratching his cheek. "Did it sound too harsh?"

"I mean, you're not wrong," she said, kind of spacing out because of the unfamiliar emotions rising in her chest. "But it sounded like you're mad at me for taking Nabi's place, even though I didn't wish for it to happen."

"Oh," he said in a guilty voice. "I didn't mean to sound like I'm blaming you. I'm sorry for hurting your feelings, Neoma."

"No, I'm just being greedy."

"Greedy? How?"

"I know Nabi is a victim like me. In fact, Nabi has it worse," she said, then she avoided his gaze and watched the Han River in front of her. Was it just her or everything looked gloomy all of a sudden? "But I still hated the idea that you care about her more than you care about me. You didn't even ask me if I wanted to return to Korea."

She sounded ridiculous.

To be honest, at first, she wanted to return to Korea with her appa. She wanted to see her eomma again. But after finding out that she took another person's place, her heart wavered. She couldn't even think about her eomma left in Korea because of her guilt.

Still, when Ruto acted protective of Nabi…

"Gosh, I'm the worst," she said, scolding herself. "I'm being immature."

"Neoma."

She forced herself to turn to Ruto because she didn't want to look like a loser in front of him. "Yeah?"

"When it comes to you, I become the personification of greed."

Okay, that made her heart flutter.

"I'm eager to send Nabi back to her world because I wanted you to stay here," Ruto confessed, then he avoided her gaze as if he was guilty. "I knew you'd want to stay in Korea because your life here is difficult. That's why I made a vow– a vow to get rid of your enemies silently, so you could live peacefully here." He let out a deep sigh. "I was supposed to do it silently, but you found out anyway."

Silently?

"Ruto, is that why you didn't tell me you fought Regina Crowell?" she confronted him. "What exactly did you do to her?"

"I almost killed her," he said casually. "Too bad she escaped."

"When did it happen?"

"The night you raided the Death Camp."

"Oh," she said, surprised. "You went there not because of me, but because you were hunting Regina Crowell?" She bit her lower lip when she felt anxious. "I knew the crows were at the camp. But I didn't know Regina Crowell was there."

"You were busy that time."

She let out a frustrated sigh. "Ruto, you should have told me from the start. Why did you have to keep me from the dark?"

"At first, I was disappointed."

"Disappointed in me?"

"In your decision," he explained, but it still hurt. "I honestly thought you'd prioritize killing Regina Crowell as soon as you gathered enough power."

"I've been too complacent."

"You just wanted to live a quiet life this time," he said softly. "Considering what you went through the first time you lived as Neoma Quinzel, I understand why you didn't seek revenge right away. But I also understand that as long as you're a de Moonasterio princess, you will never live in peace."

She already figured that much.

"That's why I came up with the decision to get rid of your enemies in secret," he said. "I've been dealing with the crows near you since you were a baby."

"Huh?"

"The only one I didn't touch was Regina Crowell, since I wanted you to kill her with your own hands," he said indifferently, which made him sound like a different person. "But the situation at the camp was dangerous that night. I was worried Regina Crowell would realize you're the princess they've been looking for. And so, I decided to kill her. She escaped, but she received severe injuries from me. I doubt she'd show up soon."

"How did she escape?" she asked, confused. "I think you're more powerful than her."

"I am more powerful than her, but I lost all my power the moment I was about to strike her with a final blow."

"Huh? How did you suddenly lose all your power?"

He smiled awkwardly while avoiding her gaze. "You summoned Vetron at that moment."

She remembered the cute doodle that allowed her to borrow Ruto's power for a moment. Then she gasped. "You mean to say I didn't borrow a small portion of your power– but the entirety of it?"

"Entirety of the power I could use that time, to be precise."

"What a bad timing," she said, kinda blaming herself for Regina Crowell's survival. Still, she couldn't help but admire the little crow's luck. "But wow. Regina Crowell is lucky."

"Regina Crowell isn't easy to kill because, just like you and me, she's also loved by a god."

"Huh?"

"The crows wouldn't exist for this long if they're not supported by at least one powerful god."

"Oh, that makes sense."

[Ruto surely knows everything.]

And yet, he kept her from the dark and acted like he knew nothing all this time.

"Ruto."

"Hmm?"

"I don't want to sound ungrateful, but I don't like how you've made decisions for me," she said with a frown. "If it concerns me, shouldn't you discuss things with me first?"

"I understand why the current you could hate it," he said. "But I can't let go of the promise I made with you in the past."

"What promise?"

She remembered her dream about a certain commander promising her he'd be a chef for her. It was Ruto, right? So, did she make another promise to her in the past?

[Wait, can I even trust my dreams?]

"Let's take a walk," Ruto said, then he offered his hand to her. "Please change the scenery, Neoma."

Neoma raised an eyebrow, but she allowed him to hold her hand. "Oh, I have a brilliant idea."

***

"WHY isn't my daughter waking up yet?"

That was what Paige Avery heard from the current emperor as soon as she regained consciousness.

When she turned around, she realized little Greko and Lewis Crevan were already up, too. Princess Neoma remained sleeping, but thankfully, she was lying down on the bed now. Moreover, the princess finally stopped crying blood.

[Greko did a good job.]

"Your Majesty," Paige Avery greeted Emperor Nikolai politely after she stood up and faced him properly. "Princess Neoma hasn't woken up yet because she's still entertaining a guest that she has invited. But I assure Your Majesty that Her Royal Highness is out of danger now."

"Who?" Emperor Nikolai asked, then he crossed his arms over his chest. "Who did Neoma invite this time?"

She hugged herself when she shuddered at the memory of the "child" she saw earlier before she left Princess Neoma's soul.

The "child" looked like he was in his early teens. He had purple hair, dark violet eyes, and curses double the amount of Princess Neoma's. That child's soul was more restricted than Princess Neoma that she wondered how a person with such a soul could function well.

[A cursed being.]

But for some reason, Princess Neoma looked friendly with the cursed child.

["Shh."]

The cursed child put a finger on the tip of his nose when their eyes met earlier. It was as if he was warning her not to tell a single soul about the curses that she saw in him.

[I feel like he'd know if I speak about his curses, then he'd come and kill me.]

She thought she wouldn't fear anything anymore after the hell she went through while trapped in the Hisa Tree. But she was wrong.

[That cursed child scares me to the bone.]

"It was Ruto," Lewis said in an annoyed voice. The young fox was clearly talking to the emperor, but he was staring at Princess Neoma's sleeping face instead. "I saw him before I left."

[Oh? Even Lewis knows the cursed child.]

"If it's Ruston Stroganoff, then it's fine," Emperor Nikolai said, as if he was relieved. "I can entrust my daughter's safety to the future commander of the White Lion Knights."

Huh?

Paige was confused.

[Does His Majesty know he's entrusting Princess Neoma to a boy cursed by the gods?]

***

IT WAS AN instant regret.

Neoma couldn't help but frown while looking at Ruto, who looked so good in the school uniform that she put on him: blazer, dress shirt, tie, pants, and black shoes.

[It suits him so well.]

Of course, she also wore her high school uniform: blazer, blouse, ribbon, skirt, and black shoes.

She changed the "setting" from Han River to the school that she went to back in Korea. It was nostalgic, but she couldn't focus on her old school because of Ruto. Even though his hair was purple and his eyes were a darker shade of his hair color, he didn't look out of place.

[He looks like a very handsome foreign student.]

"Is this your old school?" Ruto asked while looking around. "It's fascinating."

What fascinating was Ruto just looked at her earlier with a blank look on his face, even though she was pretty sure she looked very cute at the moment.

[I mean, I was practically the school idol-slash-goddess back in high school.]

"It appears you have an excellent control of your soul, Neoma," Ruto said, then he finally looked at her face. "I guess it's natural for you since you're also a Roseheart. You know, not everyone can turn their soul into a different dimension freely. But it's not good to use your soul as a meeting place often because it will leave your physical body defenseless."

"Ruto."

"Hmm?"

"Are you stronger than me?"

He smiled and tilted his head to one side. "Knowledge is power, or ignorance is bliss?"

That again?

"How cheeky," she complained, then she put her hands on her hips. "You serve the Sun Goddess, and I'm a descendant of the Moon God. Although the gods we somewhat follow are good allies, I refuse to follow you blindly, Ruto."

"I can see why you feel that way, Neoma," he said, but his eyes showed defiance. "But I can't tell you the details of my plan. Can't you just trust me and allow me to protect you in silence?"

"That will make my life easier, but it doesn't sit well with me."

It was her dream to become a lady of leisure, but she still had a conscience.

She wanted to earn the peaceful life she yearned. It would be uncomfortable for her to receive it from Ruto. Plus, she didn't like being kept in the dark.

[Why would Ruto do anything on his own anyway?]

"Neoma…"

"I won't follow anyone who's weaker than me."

He gently patted her head. "You should listen to me, if that's the case."

"I'll ask again: are you stronger than I am?"

"I think so?"

"I can't accept that," Neoma declared, then she gently patted Ruto's hand away from her head. "Ruto, let's fight now to see who's stronger."

"Okay," Ruto said, then he smiled a smile that made her shudder. "But don't cry if you lose, Neoma."

***

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***

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