In the summer of my second year of high school, Iー Sasaki Shuumei, met a certain first year.

As the seasons change and autumn descends upon us, the distance between me and him, Miyano, draws closer.

“Hey, Myaa-chan, what’s BL?”

“Let me clarify first, Sasaki-senpai, I’m talking about the work of romance between men.”

He’s just so helplessly adorable to me.

“Ah, that one.”

“Hey! I told you before to not talk about it outside……!”

I called him ‘Myaa-chan’.

It was a boys’ school, so he was also a guy, but it didn’t matter. He was just simply cute.

I didn’t know how to describe him other than “Myaa-chan is cute”. I had not the slightest clue.

Every time I tell him that he’s cute, he gets angry or blames me. But if there was something else I could replace it with, I would do so.

There’s this pounding, excitement in my heart and I don’t know what to do about it, so I kept talking, trying to calm it down.

“Myaa-chan, you’re cute.”

***

“OiーAre you there, Hirano?”

Following the voice of the class teacher, the door of the classroom suddenly opened with a loud bang.

The only people present were my two friends, who were on duty today, and me.

I had nothing to do and I was too lazy to go home, so I raised my hand and said, “Not here”, to the teacher who was about to shout again.

“If it’s Hirano, he’s probably at the committee meeting, is there something I can do for you?”

“Oh, I see. No, I got some of the papers he requested and I thought I’d give them to him if he was here.”

“Well, I’ll pass it to him. He should be finishing anytime now.”

“You bother to go…..?”

I’m aware that I’m a bit of a pain in the ass most of the time, so I couldn’t help but understand why the teacher was confused.

Well, it was an objective proof that I’m mending my bad habits. It’s a hassle, but it couldn’t be helped.

“There’s no rush.” (T)

“I’m not busy, and I have some things to do in the disciplinary office, so…” (S)

“Then I’ll trouble you, sorry about that.” (T)

I took it in my right hand, pulled the secret bag over my left shoulder, and left the classroom, saying to my friend, “See you later.”

The heaviness in my back from earlier seemed to be a lie.

The homeroom teacher left a note for Hirano to show up at the disciplinary office.

My classmate Hirano blamed me for getting involved with juniors when I didn’t have anything to do with them. But on the other hand, as long as I had an excuse, I would have no complaints. That’s what I’d do.

In fact, if Myaa-chan felt troubled, the caring Hirano would quickly step in to intervene.

But the number of days when this1 was not the case was increasing, so from outside looking in, I think that Myaa-chan was becoming more comfortable with me. 

Well, I felt good. I opened the door of the disciplinary office and smiled at Myaa-chan as I delivered the package to Hirano, saying that it was from the teacher in a carefree tone.

They were getting ready to leave. I guess I came at the right time.

“Let’s go home together, Myaa-chan.”

“No thanks, I’d like to stop by the bookstore first.”

Making some space on the cluttered desk, Hirano accepted the package, “Sank— you—.”

“You guys go home together?” (H)

“We’re on the same line.” (S)

“Ah—” (H)

Hirano gave an absent-minded affirmation as he unfolded the printout that was inside.

ーーMaybe this2 wasn’t the sort of thing where one could stop this by intervening.

Just as I was about to respond, Myaa-chan shot up from his seat.

“If you’ll excuse me, I’ll go first.” (M)

“Ah… Bye.” (H)

“Oh, no. Wait for me, Myaa-chan.” (S)

I chased after him to make sure he didn’t leave me behind, but Myaa-chan’s voice hardened.

“Today, I’ve decided that I’m going to the bookstore alone!”

He seemed kind of guilty. I guess he’s too nice to say no.

He hurried on, but as a disciplinary committee member, he didn’t run in the hallway. It was a pace I could easily keep up with in my stride, which made him look even cuter.

“Gonna buy BL?”

“Alone.” I listened to him since he emphasised so.

I wanted to know if he had other reasons.

“Hey, hey, hey, don’t come straight at me!”

That might be so, but I couldn’t quite figure out why Myaa-chan would be so flustered.

“Isn’t it easier to buy with two people?”

“Try going in front of a BL shelf with two guys! The women around us will just use us as a target!”

“So that’s how it is.”

“That’s how it is.”

Seeing how Myaa-chan was so adamant that he would rather be alone, I didn’t want to be too insistent. I wonder what I should do. Oh, that’s right.

So that means that as long as I don’t follow him to that shelf, it’s alright?

“Then I’ll wait for you at another shelf.”

When I told him, Myaa-chan swallowed his objection.

The somewhat embarrassed and troubled look in his eyes was indescribably compelling.

Myaa-chan would look me straight in the eye when he spoke, which made me nervous.

At first, there was a little hint of wariness in his eyes, but it diminished as he started to share what he liked.

All that remained was a feeling that he wasn’t able to gauge the amount of information he should share. Adorable.

However, we had yet to become close.

I wish I could get even closer to him, to know more of his thoughts and the things he was interested in. But it felt like I’m somewhat wallowing in Myaa-chan, indulging in him even if it’s not about his hobbies. Because of our status as senior and junior, there was a natural distance between us.

――But I longed to know.

Ever since I got to know him, I’ve been looking forward to coming to school everyday.

If I had joined a club or a committee, I might have been able to experience it3 early on, but I think that’s not quite the same thing as being curious about Myaa-chan. I had no one to talk to about it, so I couldn’t really put this feeling into words.

If anything, I would rather have Myaa-chan listen to me, even though he was the one concerned. I was thinking about the relationship we had with my unsettled thoughts.

“Are you really coming? I don’t think it’ll be any fun.”

“Because I want to know about you, Myaa-chan.”

“Why are you so straightforward……”

“Did you say something?”

“Nope, nothing……”

After repeating a similar exchange several times, I followed him off the train.

“If you really hate it, I’ll stop……”

“……No, I don’t hate it as much……”

That was a clumsy way of putting it. I decided to think that he was just being difficult.

If so, I needed to know more about it from here on.

He wanted to go to a large bookstore located along the train station. I’d prefer to get off the train and take a detour.

As I walked along the unfamiliar streets of the station I usually pass, I felt as if the flow of time, as well as the scenery, had changed.

“Well, I’ll be around here somewhere.”

When I pointed to the fashion magazine section, Myaa-chan seemed relieved. He had a sweet face with eyes that left deep impressions. He was really really cute when he had this carefree expression on.

I heard that he was born at the start of the year, so he must be only fifteen years old.

So we were now two years4 apart in age. No wonder he looked so cute. I couldn’t remember a time when I was such an innocent boy.

“Are you sure? I think it’ll take a while.”

How kind.

He looked genuinely apologetic, even though he hadn’t originally promised to do so and I merely forced him to follow my whims.

“It’s okay, isn’t it? Go ahead and take your time. I like to take it easy.”

“Take it easy?”Myaa-chan repeated with a hint of laughter in his voice.

“Well then, I’ll call out to you when I’m ready to head back.”

While speaking, it was clear that Myaa-chan’s attention was going elsewhere. His smile was seriously adorable.

“Okay. If I don’t see you, I’ll meet you at the exit.”

When I pointed to the exit in front of the store facing the station side, Myaa-chan nodded dramatically and slung his bag back on.

“Yes, sir. Alrighty, see you later.”

I flipped through the fashion magazines, but couldn’t find anything that suited my taste, probably because of the release date. I left the shelves, massaging my shoulders lightly.

I liked clothes, but since I wear only hand-me-downs from my sister’s boyfriend everyday, my sense of style was a little off from the trends.

“I wonder if Myaa-chan’s ready yet……”

I checked the time on my phone and not even 5 minutes had passed. This meant that I had plenty of time to kill before Myaa-chan returned. 

I’m bored and I really wanted to be with him. He said that he didn’t want me to follow him to that shelf because of the people around us, but I’m not sure if it really bothered him that much. I guess I’ll find out when I get there.

――But where would he be? Come to think of it, I wondered where they keep BL… Maybe around the BL…… manga shelf?

Realizing that I hadn’t seen anything strange before, I decided to take a look at the shelves in sequence. I slowly made my way to the back of the store, looking left and right. Shonen manga, shoujo manga.

The book I borrowed from Myaa-chan had beautiful illustrations, so I figured it must be around here.

――Oh, this was the one I saw in a drama the other day. It’s based on a shoujo manga. When I looked at it this way, there were some titles that I’ve heard of.

As I proceeded to a more secluded area, getting sidetracked along the way, I found the BL corner as expected.

As I stepped into the room, I caught a glimpse of a female customer nearby. It’s not just a fragment of my imagination. I didn’t know why, but I felt a little uncomfortable.

There seemed to be an overwhelming number of women.

――I guess it’s rare for a man to read BL. I wonder if it’s like reading shoujo manga.

The shelves were adjacent to each other, so that was probably it. Just as I was convinced, I suddenly spotted a familiar profile, letting out an unconscious “Ah!”.

“Myaa-chan.”

Myaa-chan, who had been reading the text on the back cover with a serious expression, jerked up and widened his eyes in surprise.

“?! Sasaki-senpai!”

The volume of his voice was so prominent in the bookstore that it drew even more attention.

“What ya looking at?”

“Ah, no……”

I went next to him and peered into the book, only to see a smartly designed cover that quickly caught my attention. The impression was similar to that of an apparel-related catalog. The only difference was whether it was a photograph or a drawing that was used.

I see, so there were such things. It was something one wouldn’t find at the shonen manga section. 

“Mmm, that’s cool…… that one.”

As I tried to look around the shelves, my eyes were glued to the titles lined up directly in front of me.

There were all sorts of direct sexually explicit titles that I was afraid to read out loud. It was so blatant that I couldn’t help but stare at Myaa-chan’s face as he looked away awkwardly.

“I’ve been caught”, was the reaction he had.

“It seems that more girls read BL, but the titles are not much different from erotic books for guys. It’s a little surprising.”

“That’s where the…… radical label5 comes in……”

Myaa-chan answered as his eyes shifted all over, trying to hide the book in his hand. The title he held was not even remotely erotic. 

“Label?”

This time, he blatantly looked away.

“Uh, it’s like that kind of magazine…”

“Ah…”

As I nodded my head in agreement, Myaa-chan asked me a question as if to somehow regain his composure.

“So, why did you come here?”

I could tell by the slight hint of embarrassment that he was not used to looking at these books together.

I guess he had been looking for them alone and reading them alone all these while.

“I was curious as to where it was. Apparently it’s at the far end.”

Still, the stares from the female customers around bothered me.

Rather than stabbing me, it was more of a curious look to see what was going on, and it was the first time I had ever experienced such a situation in a bookstore. At least, I didn’t get this treatment when I browsed the magazines.

Just because he chose a book that he liked, did a man, Myaa-chan, have to feel out of place?

――Hmm.

It wasn’t that he hated for me to follow him, but he had seen too much. I just wished that they would leave it more naturally. This felt quite troublesome.

And then I thought about it and realized.

It’s not a good way to think of it as trouble. I had to stop thinking like that right away.

While I was reflecting, Myaa-chan picked up another book flying flat on display. It was one of those books that had a conspicuous pop-up that says, “Bonus Included”. Had he decided not to worry about it or was he used to it?

I think it’s just a matter of having fun the way you want to.… Maybe it stood out even more because there were two of us.

So this was what Myaa-chan was mentioning earlier. It wasn’t my imagination.

As if I had timed my thought, I heard a soft whisper with a hint of buzz, “A couple?”

This kind of misunderstanding could be kind of fun.

I looked at Myaa-chan and it seemed that he didn’t hear it. Well, he could choose whatever he wanted and if he felt bothered again, I’ll just leave.

Unbeknownst to my thoughts, Myaa-chan was diligently fiddling with the book in her hand, troubled over it. 

――He’s so serious.

His hesitation and concentration was somewhat similar to the way one was fit into an unfamiliar style of clothes. I waited next to him.

――It might be the truth that this was a couple.

I resisted the urge to reach for his shoulders and gently stepped back, wondering what he was hesitant about.

If I gave too much attention to the book, I might be avoided at school. It would be very sad to be ignored by him. But it would be a whole lot of fun if he would open up to me as we slowly get to know each other.

“Oh, right, Myaa-chan, you have time today, don’t you?”

“Eh? Yeah, well……”

I smiled at Myaa-chan who tilted his head in confusion.

“Do you want to get something to eat later? I’m starving.”

It could be a fast food restaurant, a cafe, anything. Since it was a stopover, I was in the mood for one more date.

“I’m okay. I’ll go check out now.”

I had a wide smile on my face.

Just the joyful look on Myaa-chan’s face as he touched his favourite things, made my heart skip a beat.

The good will towards him didn’t stop. The number of things I found cute was increasing. If I were to rephrase the word “cute”, what would it be?

I glanced away from him with that thought in mind. The word ‘like’ in the title that caught my attention was burning into my eyes.

Like, huh….

It fits to a T.

As I slowly made my way to the exit, Myaa-chan came back from the cash register in a defenseless happy mood. The way he bounced in his run was so cute that I couldn’t help but smile faintly again. 

I like him, but that’s fine.

It wasn’t a bad idea to continue thinking that this junior was cute for a while longer.

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