Shit, I can’t stop shaking. I was sitting at the very back of the bus, holding my head and shaking in little pulls.

‘Kuromine-kun.“

“……What is it?”

“I don’t want to believe it, but are you out of your meds by any chance?”

Hoshimiya, who was looking at the view from the window, asked me, drawing back somewhat. It’s disturbing…

We were on our way to the mountains after boarding a bus for a field trip. It seems that all the second graders are going hiking together. What are we, elementary school kids….? I think it is a good idea, but the school we are going to is known for its events, and they’re emphasizing the need to actively experience nature in this age of digital technology.

“Hey, Kuromine-kun. Your face is pale and you’re shaking……You ran out of medicine, right?”

“I heard that earlier.”

The bus seats were decided by lottery, and miraculously I ended up next to Hoshimiya. I was so happy that I screamed out in my heart when the seating was decided, but considering my current situation, I can say that it was the worst thing that could have happened. I didn’t want her to see me in such bad shape.

“You’re not alright……right?”

“I’m fine. I’m just wishing for the world’s perpetual despair.”

“What’s wrong, Kuromine-kun!? You’re too sick to be bus sick!”

“…….It’s not bus sickness.”

“Umm……..What should I do? Should I call the doctor?”

“No. It’s my problem……”

Hoshimiya looks worried about me, but it can’t be helped.

I just have to be patient until we reach our destination.

That’s what I thought, but a female student sitting to my left spoke to me.

“Riku-chan, you’re scaring me……I can give you a lap pillow.”

My childhood friend Haruno gives me a gentle smile. She taps her own lap and designates a position for me to place my head. Hoshimiya on my right, Haruno on my left. What a miracle.

“Come here, Riku-chan. On my lap.”

Even after that rainy day, Haruno maintained her usual attitude. As if clinging to her gentle and soft atmosphere, I leaned back, remembering my junior high school days, and asked Haruno to let me use her lap. After all, being by Haruno’s side is where I can relax the most. The fear that consumed my heart subsided, and the trembling in my body stopped as if it was a lie.

“I did this on the junior high school trip as well, didn’t I?”

As she said this, Haruno gently stroked my head. It was a familiar hand, and she knew just the right amount of force to make me feel comfortable.

“You two really are good friends.”

“Well, that’s part of it, but Riku-chan is afraid of cars.”

“Cars?”

“That’s right. When we went out of town, he would only walk on the edge of the sidewalk……Or he used to crunch on the spot and get stuck just because he heard a horn. It’s better now, though.”

“T, that’s right. And yet, at that time……”

Haruno and Hoshimiya were talking about me.

I’m starting to feel a little embarrassed.

“That’s why we used to walk around town holding hands all the time when we were in junior high school~”

“……It’s really embarrassing, so don’t say it.”

Somehow I didn’t want Hoshimiya to know. No, it’s not just her, it’s the others too.

“Ah, sorry, Ayana-chan! It looks like I’m showing off!”

“No. It’s okay, don’t worry about it. You two are really well-matched….. You guys get along so well, but you aren’t together?”

“Ahaha……We have a bit of a complicated situation……”

Haruno misdirected with a bitter smile. She is currently waiting for me to give her an answer. I am sorry for making them wait, but I cannot make a rash decision.

“Haruno. I don’t want a lap pillow anymore……”

I raise my head from Haruno’s lap and return to my posture.

“Why?”

“I can’t keep having you spoiling me forever. I have to get over it.”

“I see……But hey, we’ve known each other since childhood, so I think it’s okay for me to spoil you.”

“No……That’s not how it works. It would be fine if we were dating, but we’re just normal childhood friends.”

And I didn’t want Hoshimiya to see me being pampered by Haruno…… I can feel my face going pale. My limbs were shaking and I felt cold to the core. I didn’t think I was that scared of cars.

I am probably deeply frightened, just not aware of it.

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