Walk Into Your Good Night

06

After knowing Tang Jingchuan, I had turned into the kind of fool I would have looked down on before.

In order to pick them up back home, the next day I headed to the Third Hospital early in the morning. I bought breakfast and brought it upstairs.

When I entered, Tang Jingchuan was walking out with a thermos in hand. He was stunned when he saw me.

I said, “Morning. I bought breakfast over.”

He looked at me, then at the bag I was holding.

I knew that I was overly attentive; no one’s neighbours would be so eager to serve to this extent. Yet I couldn’t help it, wanting to solve everything for him.

He said to me, “It must be such a bother to you [formal] …..”

I saw that he was in a difficult position, but I still forced him to accept my favor.

After eating breakfast, Tang Jingchuan left to do the discharging procedures. I remained in the hospital room with his wife.

This was not a single-person room. There were a lot of patients in this large room; more relatives came and went in comparison with the patients.

I watched her pack, and asked, “Feeling better now?”

She smiled at me, and I discovered a dimple on her right cheek.

From the first day I saw her, I didn’t find her beautiful. She was a very normal type of woman, soft and delicate. She would blend into a crowd, but looking at her smile, I found it quite pleasant.

She said, “A lot better.”

She turned around and sat by the bed, said to me, “I’m sorry for causing apologies for you so early in the morning.

“There’s no need to be polite. Jingchuan and I are considered friends.”

I only dared to say that when he was not around. In front of him, I didn’t even dare to call his name, afraid that my heart would beat too fast and reveal secrets.

“That’s great.” Her eyes were lowered. She softly said, “Jingchuan doesn’t have many friends, especially after I got ill. He took care of me all day, not even heading to gatherings with his colleagues.“

I looked at her. Perhaps it was because of love me, love my dog [1] , I took pity on this woman too.

[1] 爱屋及乌, lit. meaning “love the house and its crow”, idiom

“We live close to each other, so if you both have anything you need, you can tell me.” I did my best to take work onto my shoulders. Maybe it was also because I knew that, clearly, her days were numbered.

She smiled at me, eyes bent, “Come to our house for dinner tonight. I talked to Jingchuan, and asked him to buy food.”

I shouldn’t go, but I said, “Sure.”

I should not have done so, but I accepted the invitation.

There were too many things you shouldn’t do in your life, but who hasn’t broken the rules once or twice?

I asked, “Does Jingchuan know how to cook?”

“He’s bad at it.” She said, smiling. “He tried a few times; tasted terrible. Despite being a quite clever person, he has no talent in cooking.”

Listening to her talk about Tang Jingchuan, I somehow smiled along with her.

After sending them back, I returned to my office.

I was busy for the whole day. At four in the afternoon I suddenly thought of that invitation. I finished dealing with the work I had on my hands. Picked two bottles of good wine from my office, and went out.

I returned back to my home and tidied up my appearance meticulously. I changed in and out of three sets of clothing.

It was just a casual meal, but I insisted on dressing up. I was probably overthinking it, but who knows when it will happen again.

When Tang Jingchuan rang the doorbell, I was fiddling with my cufflinks. They were a birthday present from my father two years ago. Although I acted like an asshole in front of him, in reality, I missed him a lot. I wanted him to witness my every important moment.

I opened the door. He was standing there, wearing loungewear.

“I thought you haven’t returned yet.”

I stood aside to let him in. “I just got back.”

I shrugged. “Haven’t even changed my clothes yet.”

I pretended that the clothes I wore was from work. It was best if only I knew of my attentiveness towards him.

He stood at the entrance and did not enter. He said politely, “The ingredients are ready. Xiaoyun said she’ll wait for you to come to start cooking, to prevent it from getting cold.”

“Ok.” I turned to get the bottles of wine. “Then let’s head over now.”

Actually, I wanted to invite him to come and sit for a bit in my house. Obviously, he didn’t want to do so.

We walked together towards his house, he said, “Xiaoyun keeps saying she wants to thank you properly. I also heard from Dr. Xu that we wouldn’t have a bed in the hospital if not for you.”

I didn’t think that he would know about that. I could only say with embarrassment, “No trouble at all [2].”

[2] The term used was 举手之劳, lit. the extortion of lifting one’s hands (idiom). fig. slight effort.

“No,” said Tang Jingchuan, smiling lightly, “For you, it might be no trouble, but for us…”

He paused, stopped, and turned to face me.

He said, “I can roughly guess your thoughts, but Xiaoyun is a patient, and we both aren’t that kind of person. Tonight, this meal is as thanks for what you have helped us previously. I know that, for someone like you, you don’t need this meal, nor are you short of a woman. We appreciate your help, but there’s no need to do so anymore in the future.”