Life Going Wild With Plug-ins

[Extra] 61 - Drunken Hometown (First Part) - Mid-Autumn Festival Congratulations

T/N: Content warning for implied intercourse. On another note, idk why the author is putting these epilogue chapters here, but alas I am merely the translator and have no control over the order of the story... we’ll be back to where we left off with the main story after ‘Drunken Hometown’ is over. Since these are really just epilogue chapters, feel free to skip them and come back later.

———01

When Ye Lan came up and stuck to him, Ye Xiao was abruptly awakened from a dream, feeling a sense of danger like prey being caught by a ferocious beast.

However, it was already too late, there was no warning signs for this surprise attack as Ye Lan pressed against his back, held his body in place and, without any preparation, immediately pierced him through from top to bottom.

Ye Xiao felt so much pain he saw black, and his grogginess immediately vanished like smoke in the air as he cursed under his breath: “Fuck, how are you in heat again?!”

During the day Ye Lan was very obedient, if he drew a circle and told him to not go out, he would obediently crouch inside and wait for orders. But going into the night, he was the complete opposite, and his excitement made him almost entirely self-centred and unable to regard the needs of others.

As usual, Ye Xiao took out a short knife and slashed downwards, wanting to force him back. This was originally an empty show of force, but Ye Lan didn’t dodge at all and allowed the sharp blade to pierce into his arm.

At this moment, all that was left of him was lust and animal nature, and he wanted to follow those instincts, but it was also in his nature to never be guarded against Ye Xiao. Ye Xiao was startled, he cursed under his breath as he withdrew the hand with the short knife, and the sharp blade left behind a trail of blood in the air as it was pulled out. Ye Xiao didn’t want to really hurt him, so he didn’t dare make another move, and he just used all his strength to turn over and jump to the side to avoid him. Ye Lan seized the opportunity to grab his wrists and pin them against the wall, pushing onto his back and forcing him to press up against the wall, making it difficult for him to make even a fraction of a movement. Ye Xiao’s wuggong methods excelled at long range and concealed weapons, so trying to compete against Ye Lan with brute force was simply wishful thinking. He was wedged between the wall and Ye Lan, with no room to move out of the way.

The movements of the person behind him were rough and savage, at first Ye Xiao involuntarily whimpered a few times due to the sharp pain, but he gradually lost the strength to resist and his moaning also quieted down. In order to force Ye Xiao to make a sound, Ye Lan continuously increased his strength. Ye Xiao already didn’t know if what hurt more was the force with which he was rammed against the wall or the sharp blade wreaking havoc on his lower body, and his consciousness was almost broken.


When Ye Xiao woke up once again, it felt more like he was dragged back into consciousness by an intense sense of pain. His knees and chest were covered in blue-green bruises, and his wrists were red and swollen from being gripped, without moving he could feel a thick liquid slowly gushing out from between his legs, some of it already cold, and some still warm.

It wasn’t dawn yet, and probably only a sichen or two had passed. Ye Lan was lying on top of him, already asleep, and hadn’t forgotten to hug him tightly. The lewd scent of essence and the light smell of blood lingered in the air.

Ye Lan looked at him, sleeping soundly, and was incredibly angry.

His lower body was sticky, and he didn’t need to think about it to know how much of a mess it was, he endured the discomfort as he lay down for a while, and once he had recovered a little of his physical strength, he slapped Ye Lan on the head: “Shameful!”

He didn’t have any strength, so his hand was as light as a feather and Ye Lan didn’t wake at all.

“Fuck you~ Wake up~” Ye Xiao used the little strength he had left to slap him on the cheek and reprimand him, but unfortunately his scolding was also light as a feather and didn’t affect the other at all.

Ye Lan slightly opened his eyes into a thin line, looking out blankly, and in a daze shifted towards the side of his body, hugging his leg and rubbing against it, and continued sleeping peacefully.

Ye Xiao felt depressed.

Martial arts practitioners, for the most part, were very vigilant towards the movements of those around them, and would only become unguarded around those people they trusted with their heart and soul, to the point where they wouldn’t be woken by the smallest movement. Ye Xiao knew he was that kind of special existence for Ye Lan, and he used to think that was something to be proud of, but in the current circumstances, he hated he couldn’t just smash him into the wall.

Ye Xiao trembled as he pushed Ye Lan away, then ruthlessly kicked him down from the bed, and supported himself on the railing to sit up. With this light movement, he suddenly felt as though a spring gushed down from his secret place, flowing down his legs and immediately wetting a large area of his lower body.

Ye Xiao cursed in his mind.

Afterwards, he took a deep breath and exerted all of his power to get down on the ground, then he carelessly draped a garment over his shoulders and made his way to the back of the mountain, supporting himself on the walls and the trees the whole journey there. There was a dense forest behind the mountain, and a clear spring flowed down through it, converging into a stream. When he had just come to the Sword Pavilion, Ye Xiao took a liking to this place and talked about how convenient it would be to bathe here, and Pavilion Master Jun Xuanheng teased him: “We are wealthy big-shots, you should naturally call for a maid to help you bathe, why would you wash out in the wilderness?”

Ye Xiao spoke without thinking: “Just in case it’s an inconvenient time.”

He never expected his words to become a prophecy, directly dooming him to being “inconveniently” done by Ye Lan practically every day, so that he needed to hide in this place without people to surreptitiously clean up the turbid liquid inside his body. There was a circle of rocks scattered to one side of the mountain spring, where the river was very shallow and would just reach up to his shoulders when sitting, Ye Xiao reclined on a rock, almost paralysed, and stiffly reached inside his body to wash out the flow of white turbid, and bloody liquid.

When Ye Xiao finished washing, the ache on his body had still not subsided, so he continued to recline on the rock, paralysed, lost in thought as he stared up at the stars.

His fury had settled down, and he actually felt somewhat wronged.

Ye Xiao touched his butt, sucked in a breath through his nose, and sighed in a low voice: “It can’t always be like this….. when is it going to end, ah…..”


Ye Xiao’s period of patience with Ye Lan finally reached its peak.

That time, the previous wound on his secret place had not yet healed when it was split open again, and he was simply unable to restrain his anger, he made a firm resolution to kick him out of the room from now on, and to not allow him to take even half a step.

It was clear that Ye Lan had been given a place to stay alone, but he was unwilling to settle and sleep, so every night he would crouch on Ye Xiao’s roof and couldn’t be driven away, making it seem just as if he were being bullied.

Ye Xiao was really sullen, so he grabbed him by the ear and put a chain around his neck, tying him up to the railing on a small window on the firewood shed.

The Pavilion Master and Qiqi seemed to be slightly critical towards this plan, but since Ye Lan was his shadow guard, it was difficult for other people to disagree.

According to Ye Lan’s strength, it would have been very easy for him to free himself from that small, broken, barred window that was practically on the verge of collapse, but he remained obediently tied up, clinging to that small window every day and looking towards the outside, waiting for Ye Xiao to pass by so he could get a look.

Ye Lan was shut away for several days, but contrary to expectations, he didn’t cause any trouble. Ye Xiao discovered that, apparently, as long as he wasn’t sleeping next to him, he would remain very well behaved and wouldn’t go into heat.


Ye Xiao would rather he had gotten angry and caused destruction, that way he could take advantage of the situation and properly put him in his place. But, unfortunately, he was so obedient it made it seem like he was deliberately being hard on him.

This method of keeping him tied up was not the way, so Ye Xiao hid for several days, becoming increasingly more depressed and feeling like he was going to go bald.

Pavilion Master Jun Xuanheng shook his head and said: “What are you thinking, Ye Lan is the one that’s going to go bald.”

Then, he rubbed the fluffy hair of the loyal dog, the Second Pavilion Master, who was half a head taller than him, and proudly said: “Ye Lan is truly too miserable following you. Look at my A-Tan, shiny and jet-black, I raised him really well.”

Ye Tan listened to him in silence and, without batting an eye, slightly bent his knee to make it easier for his Master to stroke him gently.


Ye Xiao was very unwilling to concede, so he decided to go see Ye Lan to compare who was more bald….. oh, that wasn’t it, who was more miserable.

Ye Lan clung to the small barred window and looked at him, his eyes were so bright they looked like they contained a galaxy, and he seemed about to start madly wagging his tail.

Ye Xiao went around the firewood shed and pushed the door open. He hadn’t seen him for several days, and Ye Lan was already covered in grime and looking dejected, the neat pile of firewood had also been dug into a large messy hole by him, and he looked just like an abandoned stray dog.

Ye Lan excitedly threw himself into his arms, but he hadn’t gone two steps when the iron chain was stretched taut, halting his steps. Ye Lan somewhat impatiently gave it a strong tug, and the barred window was entirely uprooted and smashed into the ground.

Ye Lan was stunned, it seemed that he had just remembered he was being punished for his wrongdoings, so he became flustered as he picked up the barred window and stuffed it back in place, trying to set it up as it had been before. The brick surrounding the window had all been broken into pieces, so he used brute force to secure it back in place, but the hole in the wall only got larger instead. Seeing that he would soon pulverise the entire wall, Ye Xiao was forced to stop him:

“Hurry up and stop that you idiot…..”

Ye Lan nervously held onto the barred window, looking like he was going to cry: “Gui Mao I- I’m sorry I was wrong, I didn’t do it on purpose….. I was too happy just now and I forgot….. I won’t mess with it any more…..”

Ye Xiao asked: “Oh? You were wrong? What were you wrong about?”

Ye Lan trembled and spoke in a small voice: “I don’t, don’t know….. but I’m sure I was wrong…..”

Ye Xiao sighed: Alas, it’s like playing lute to a cow1 .

Ye Lan lowered his head behind his hair and trembled in fear, the cast iron bars of the window becoming deformed in his grip. Seeing him in such a panic, Ye Xiao still felt his heart hurt in the end.

“Forget it….. I realised something.” Ye Xiao sighed, rescuing the barred window from his grip and steadying that pair of trembling hands, and said to himself: “Sigh, there’s no need to force both you and I to become bald, it’s enough if I’m the only bald one.”

Ye Lan did not understand at all: “Ah? What does that mean?”

Ye Xiao smiled sadly: “It’s a very brave confession.”


Ye Xiao at last admitted his fate, and once again welcomed Ye Lan into his room.

Although he experienced this matter, nothing changed at all, Ye Lan did not remember anything when he got in the mood, and still acted as recklessly as he had before.


As Ye Xiao closed his eyes and leaned against the rock for a while, he heard the sound of someone stepping over dead leaves as they trotted over. Their pace slowed down as the approached, seemingly afraid of waking him up, and stopped at the shore.

Ye Xiao opened his eyes and cast a sidelong glance, sure enough, he was met with the sight of Ye Lan.

Ye Lan hurriedly explained: “When I woke up you weren’t there, and I really missed you, so I came to find you.”

Ye Xiao was silent for a while: “If you keep running around naked in the future, you’re really going to end up in prison.”

Ye Lan lowered his head and looked at himself: “Ah?….. Oh….. I came out in a hurry.”

Ye Xiao pointed to the garment he’d scattered by the side of the road when he arrived: “Put that on.”

Hearing this, Ye Lan draped the garment over his shoulders.

Ye Xiao thought about it: “That’s not right, then I won’t have anything to wear. You better take that off and give it to me….. You’re a fool, after all, you don’t need to save face, but I still need to save face.”

“Oh.” Hearing this, Ye Lan took it off and gave it to him.

Ye Xiao was silent for a while, and said: “Why does it feel like I’m bullying you.”

Ye Lan stared at him blankly.

“Forget it, I just won’t wear anything.” Ye Xiao smashed the cracked pot and abandoned his integrity, and said: “I can’t move, carry me up.”

Hearing this, Ye Lan hurriedly fished him up and gathered him into his embrace, holding him tightly. Ye Xiao had just been soaking in cold water, so he felt that Ye Lan’s embrace was extremely warm, making him want to cling to it.

Ye Xiao was deeply worried: “Okay, let’s go back. Hurry up, we absolutely can’t let boss Ye Tan see…..”


Ye Xiao was scared and on edge the whole way back, fearing that people would see them and think of them as perverts.

Actually, he didn’t need to worry so much, because there would still be plenty of opportunities for him to be forced to run around naked, and he would be seen sooner or later.


02

The next morning, the sky was bright, and Ye Xiao was still only half-conscious when Qiqi dragged him out from the quilt: “Aiya you lazy bastard! You’re still sleeping!”

Ye Xiao spoke weakly and without strength: “I wasn’t sleeping, this is paralysis.”

Qiqi looked at his dispirited expression, worriedly saying: “Ah? Are you sick?”

“That’s not it…..” Ye Xiao pulled the quilt back up and got in, kneading his aching waist and backside as he sighed, “This is grown-up business, children shouldn’t ask too many questions.”

Qiqi: “??? What thing? You’re using this rubbish excuse to dodge me again!” Qiqi spat, lifting the quilt and forcefully pulling him away from the pillow, “Aiya it doesn’t matter it’s too late! Big brother Ye Tan and the others left a long time ago! Hurry up! Lazy bastard!”

Ye Xiao attempted to defend himself by wrapping the quilt around him to no avail, so he was dragged out of bed by her, crying without tears and with hatred in his heart. Ever since Qiqi had been spending time studying gongfu with Ye Tan, her strength had truly grown more and more, while he only got weaker with each passing day, if it kept going like this it wouldn’t be long before she could just hang him up and beat him…..

Ye Xiao groaned and noisily argued: “Hey where are we going….. what are we doing…..”

Qiqi hit him with a wet handkerchief, roughly wiping at his face: “Moon gazing! The Baishu’s lakeside Qiusi Building was booked for today, I specifically told you about it yesterday!”

Ye Xiao: “That’s unreasonable, how the hell are we going to look at the moon in broad daylight? Can’t I wait until I wake up and look at it by myself from home?”

“That makes sense, actually I also don’t really understand.” Qiqi nodded, but still persisted, “But it was big brother Luoshu who arranged it, he said all scholars do this kind of thing.”

It seemed like he wouldn't be able to avoid today, Ye Xiao held his waist and slowly ambled out the door, mumbling: “You scholars are really troublesome dicks…..”

Watching Ye Xiao going out, Ye Lan didn’t ask anything and obediently followed him.

Qiqi watched as Ye Xiao, who was always jumping about, now looked as weak as a willow bending in the wind, and worriedly said: “Surprisingly this monkey didn’t jump out the window today, it seems like is illness is really serious.”


Ye Xiao grabbed Ye Lan and hurried him to the roof of the car, while he himself hid away inside the carriage to peacefully catch up on his sleep. They jostled along for less than half a day, and arrived at Baishu Lake in the afternoon. The field of view was wide here, and the Qiusi building rose deeply from the ground, almost grazing the stars, and was a sacred scenic spot known far and wide.

The top floor had vapour curling up all around it, as though it was placed high up in the clouds. Ye Tan’s party had arrived a lot earlier, and now over half the food had gone cold, so they ordered someone to take it away and replace it with new one.

Ye Xiao watched anxiously as the fine food and delicacies were completely taken away, and held his absolutely empty stomach as he grumbled: “Hey I haven’t eaten anything all day….. do you have anything to fill the gap in my stomach?”

“We only have the plum wine the Eldest Young Master gave us, he said he brewed it himself.” Jun Xuanheng lay paralysed in Ye Tan’s arms as always, and flipped through some books he picked up along the road, “Actually, he’s given it to us many times, it’s always been kept in the cellar and I haven’t opened one yet, so I brought it along today to try.”

Ye Xiao weakly lay on his stomach over the table, paralysed, and knocked on the surface of the table: “I’m already too hungry to be picky, don’t choose don’t choose, bring it.”

In response, a few maids answered, they arranged some porcelain cups, patted open the sealing clay2 , and filled up the cups one by one, the corridor soon became filled with a fragrant scent.

Jun Xuanheng held his porcelain cup with both hands and took in a deep breath, it had both the sweet scent of fruit and the mellow and rich fragrance of wine, so he asked: “A-Tan, do you want to try? It seems that I’ve never seen you drink before.”

Ye Tan lowered his head and said: “It’s a rule for shadow guards to never touch a drop of alcohol.”

Jun Xuanheng asked: “For fear of getting drunk?”

Ye Tan nodded: “Yes. However, if you really want to drink, the Nightrunner has a drug-resistance training meant to be used for when interrogated under torture, you can use your inner breath to temporarily suppress the effects and maintain a clear head.”

Jun Xuanheng was curious: “Then, what do you do when you can’t use your inner power?”

“Kill yourself.” Ye Tan’s tone was flat, “A shadow guard’s life is unimportant, inferior to the importance of intelligence.”

Jun Xuanheng trembled.

Following which, he drily said: “This, this rule is not good, you better change it…..”

Ye Tan meekly accepted the order: “Yes.”

Jun Xuanheng took a few sips, it was sweet and soft as it entered his mouth, not irritating at all, so he said again: “It’s so sweet, try a bit? It doesn’t matter today, the guards are waiting downstairs.” Seeing Ye Tan was still hesitating, there seemed to be a hidden trouble that was hard to bring up, so he suddenly asked: “A-Tan, do you not like to drink?”

“I actually have….. some pretty bad memories.” Ye Tan said.

“…..Ah.” Jun Xuanheng carefully thought back, remembering something, and carefully asked, “Is it from that feast the day Young Master Qin Qi died?”

Ye Tan nodded.

That was the only time he had ever drunk wine in his life, and he had abandoned himself to despair and intended to die, so it really didn’t leave a good impression.

Jun Xuanheng immediately understood, his chest was inundated with heartache, and he turned his body to hug him and stroke his head, appeasing him as though he were coaxing a child: “Hey A-Tan if you don’t like it just don’t drink.”

He had just drunk wine, so the corners of his eyes had an intoxicated flush, and the smell of wine lingered between his lips and teeth.

Ye Tan’s heart suddenly stirred, and he wanted to see how sweet this wine really was.

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1 Like the saying ‘casting pearls before swine’, meaning to try and reason with/do something for someone who won’t understand/appreciate it. Basically saying its a waste of words. Top.

2 Old time-y wine jars were sealed with clay around the mouth like so to guarantee the freshness of the liquor. Top.