I and My Husband Sleep in a Coffin

Chapter 77 You’re here, brother?

Another crazy one.

Wang Xiaomie sighed heavily as he saw Bai Yu in front of him go from shock and disbelief to murmuring guesses to himself before erupting in a hysterical roaring.

In the eyes of others, he was a puppet with no self-awareness and no ability to speak, thus he became the best outlet for venting.

Bai Yu's tears flowed down his cheeks as he knelt beside Wang Xiaomie's chair, clutching the photo and pocket watch to his chest. He appeared to be struggling to breathe.

Wang Xiaomie saw how wretched he was and sighed, observing a moment of silence for him: his husband has become his grandfather in the blink of an eye, and his love rival is his grandmother. Nobody can stand it.

Bai Yu wept for a time, then seized Wang Xiaomie's paws and sobbed heart-wrenchingly: "Why! Why! No way! How could it be—ahhh!"

Wang Xiaomie: "..."

Paws, paws hurt!

Bai Yu broke down completely, crying and raging from the depths of his soul: "He’s actually my grandfather, he’s actually my grandfather! Why didn't he tell me? Why not tell me!"

Wang Xiaomie: Tragic, too tragic.

Bai Yu: "I see him as my beloved, but he regards me as a grandson!"

Wang Xiaomie: .........

Wang Xiaomie: We puppets are professionally trained. We’ll not laugh no matter how funny, unless—

"Worse, I have to call him Grandpa..."

Bai Yu, the genuine grandson, sobbed even more sadly.

"Pfft!"

Bai Yu was stunned for a second before abruptly raising his head. Wang Xiaomie sat there with a blank expression on his face and vacant eyes, staring at God knows what.

Did I mishear it?

Bai Yu's forehead furrowed before lowering his head and continuing to sob broken-heartedly. He missed seeing Wang Xiaomie's face contort in an instant as he bowed his head, his face pinched with suppressed laughter.

"He accepted me as an apprentice, taught me the craftsman’s work without reservation, provided me with all basic necessities, gave me warm milk every day, and even washed my clothes. He took me to the amusement park as well as the movies...

He has recently been increasingly distanced from me, and what he stated..."

No wonder... no wonder!

He's known for a long time, but he's been keeping it from me...

Bai Yu was sobbing so hard that his entire body shook. It was no surprise to him that Yi Yan was kind to him. It turns out that he was the one who got it wrong. Yi Yan had never shown that sort of interest in him, always loving him as the younger generation. He only began to alienate Bai Yu after discovering his intentions...

Inexplicable shame, anger, and pain all laughed at him.

It was as if someone was scoffing in Bai Yu's ear: 'So ridiculous. You actually fell in love with your elder.'

That trumped up voice was like the devil whispering in Bai Yu's ears, and his heart welled up with hate, but he was confused once again.

Who did he hate?

Hate Yi Yan? Yi Yan had only loved him as his grandchild and had never considered him to be interested in himself.

Hate Xiaomie & co? What had this got to do with them?

Nobody was wrong, nobody was wrong... So what went wrong? As he knelt on the ground, Bai Yu's face was covered in tears and his expression was bewildered.

"I didn't think twice about poisoning Xiaomie to help him, betraying my good friend, and this is how I ended up? I just want a home... I just want to spend the rest of my life with someone I like and have a complete family..."

Bai Yu suddenly started laughing, his laughter becoming increasingly loud. His eyes were red and puffy, and his face looked lifeless, as if he was insane.

Wang Xiaomie's laughter vanished when he saw him like this and shook his head in his heart.

It is said that fate conspires against you and that you overreach yourself. He used to watch soap operas and read novels with the plot of 'the person I like turned out to be my relative.'

He was still laughing about it at the time, thinking, "They dare to film and write anything nowadays. This plot is just crap!" What was the outcome?

A live enactment was taking place in front of his eyes.

Yi Yan, in the opinion of an outsider such as Wang Xiaomie, was to blame for this fiasco.

What was Yi Yan trying to conceal? Even if he didn't say it earlier, he should have said it when he accepted Bai Yu as an apprentice. But he didn't say anything!

You did a great job bending your grandson!

Wang Xiaomie sighed: What do you call this...

Bai Yu sat for a long time, sobbing and laughing hysterically.

After a few hours, he lurched to his feet, his face dead behind the eyes. After sitting for so long, he was undoubtedly numb and limped away without glancing at Wang Xiaomie.

Wang Xiaomie blinked and exhaled a sigh of relief after he left. He didn't have to pretend any longer. Despite everything, he gazed at the top of the flight of steps, a little concerned for Bai Yu.

He was disappointed and upset with Bai Yu to be honest, yet he didn't hate him to the point of death. Wang Xiaomie felt sympathy when he saw Bai Yu in such a state, and he was also worried that Bai Yu might do something dumb in a moment of melancholy.

Bai Yu, after all, appeared lighthearted and foolish, but he was actually rather stubborn. At a glance, you could tell he was an expert at banging his head against a brick wall.

One day passed.

Bai Yu's upper eyelids were red and swollen the next day, like two blisters. His round eyes had only a seam remaining, and the bottoms of his eyes were bruised bluish black. He had clearly cried all night the night before.

Moreover, his face was sullen, and he was no longer as cute as he used to be with a goofy smile that revealed his white teeth, as if he were a different person.

After he came upstairs, he manipulated the puppet to allow Wang Xiaomie to take care of bodily functions, then turned around and silently left.

This type of Bai Yu startled and panicked Xiaomie. He asked himself: When Yi Yan returns, Bai Yu won’t fight with him, will he?

Yi Yan returned after another day and a half.

A thumping sound came from the second story of the wooden building. Bai Yu came upstairs and manipulated him down the steps without saying a word. Wang Xiaomie went downstairs and discovered a filthy Yi Yan seated on a wooden chair on the first floor. Yi Yan was sipping tea and there was a large white sack beside him.

There was some type of unfathomable putrid odor on his body, like the scent of blood, soil, rust, and other messy smells combined together, and even a bitter and astringent scent was evident.

Additionally...

Wang Xiaomie took a quick look around the living room and outside the open door; all of the other cars appeared to be missing.

There was no one else around. Only Yi Yan made it back from among the more than twenty tomb raiders...

Wang Xiaomie was chilled.

What surprised him even more was that Bai Yu was still standing by Yi Yan's side. He didn't appear to have fought or argued, despite the fact that he wasn't that intimate.

Didn't Bai Yu tell Yi Yan that he had discovered the truth? Why?

Wang Xiaomie was unable to figure it out.

"Did anything happen during my absence during the last couple of days?"

His tone was gentle, but it was exhausted. He asked Bai Yu softly, turning his head.

"No."

Bai Yu shook his head.

Yi Yan nodded, "I'm a little injured and tired. You instruct Xiao An to carry them to a room and lock them up. When I’ve finished tending to my wounds, I’ll prepare to welcome the guests."

"OK," Bai Yu said. Yi Yan rose up and walked upstairs, putting down the teacup. Bai Yu walked out of the door with a cold face and summoned Xiao An. He controlled Wang Xiaomie, while Xiao An carried the large white sack. They went to a nearby room, stuffed Xiaomie and the sack inside casually, and left.

The wooden door squeaked when it was locked, and the duo outside withdrew after the door was locked.

Wang Xiaomie perked his ears and blinked as soon as the footsteps were no longer audible. His dull eyes seemed to encompass the starry sky in an instant, bright and spirited.

He called out to the large sack on the ground in hushed tones, "Hey, are you okay? Still alive?"

The sack moved slightly, and a withered hand covered in purple bristles emerged from the mouth of the sack, which had been purposefully loosened a little.

Sure enough... An Kai's family’s little emperor was also captured.

"You’re here bro[1]~" Wang Xiao whispered, raising his lips.

The awful hand with purple hair froze, then waved furiously a few times, causing the sack to shake. The sack's opening was small, and only one hand could fit through it. The person in the sack was at a loss for what to do. Little Purple Hair inside scratched it for a long time with his fingernails, but it had no impact.

"Roar—"

Purple Hair roared anxiously and nervously. Wang Xiaomie was afraid that his roars might summon their captors, so he quickly appeased him.

"Don't be scared, don't be scared! An Kai and Wen Fengjin will definitely come looking for us. That man won't hurt us for the time being; please bear with me!"

Purple Hair's struggling movements became smaller.

"Roar—"

It snarled again, this time in a low voice, and started making strange noises, as if speaking to Wang Xiaomie.

Wang Xiaomie sighed, "Sorry, buddy. I know I'm a zongzi too, but I really don't understand the zongzi language. Don't worry, though. We’ll definitely go out."

"Roar..."

Purple Hair sounded disappointed, and the sack also stopped moving. It was pitiful to witness.

Wang Xiaomie stopped acting when he saw no one was watching. He moved his body with difficulty and parked his buttocks beside Purple Hair, comforting him by patting his shoulder.

He was depressed as he looked at the sliver of light streaming in through the small wooden door.

"Iron gates, barred windows, iron chains[2], yingyingying, Xiao Wenzi, where are you..."

"Sigh~"

… … …

Wen Fengjin glanced at the thick letter left for him by Yi Yan at his place that day and threw it away. It was nothing more than a jumble of clues leading him to Qishan.

Wen Fengjin, who had long foreseen everything, raced to An Kai's tomb without hesitation.

As a result, he arrived at his destination in three days rather than the minimum of four days predicted by Yi Yan.

Wen Fengjin did not immediately go looking for Wang Xiaomie. He instead proceeded to An Kai's underground tomb.

He spotted signs of messy hidden weapon mechanisms, as well as some equipment abandoned by tomb raiders, in the moss-covered tomb passage.

Even though this tomb palace was not as huge or as magnificent as Wen Fengjin's, it was nevertheless a joint burial tomb for a general and an emperor. The inside space was not small, and the design was sufficiently complex.

The crimson robe swung in a leisurely arc as the gold threaded black boots stepped over the bodies and blood puddles on the ground.

Wen Fengjin raised his pink lips and smiled when he noticed An Kai sitting on his knees resting against the coffin, his body propped up by the pike in his hand, as well as the dead zombie soldiers and tomb raiders around him.

He stopped and asked lightly to An Kai, who had his head down and his eyes closed, "Are you dead?"

An Kai raised his head, his armor covered in blood and scars, and the young general smiled as candidly as before.

"No. I still have a breath," he remarked.

The golden armor jangled as An Kai rose up with the help of his pike and stretched his waist, his eyes as cold as frost beneath his smile.

"My family’s little emperor was taken away."

Wen Fengjin: "Mn. So was my shixiong."

The two men who’d lost their wives looked at each other and sneered.

"According to plan?"

"Yes."

"That's good... I must kill him this time to avoid future troubles. Otherwise, wouldn't we suffer a double loss after trying to trick the enemy?"

An Kai's tone was slightly heavy. He leaned against the coffin, pike in hand, and turned his head to look at the man next to him.

He arched his eyebrows when he noticed Wen Fengjin was silent.

"Aren't you in a hurry? So calm."

"Of course I'm in a hurry."

Wen Fengjin leaned against the coffin as well, his expression turning icy, his long and narrow eyes sharpening, and the blood-red pattern between his brows becoming more and more vivid.

"Shixiong has been away from me for nearly four days..." he muttered.

"Tsk! Calm down, don't go crazy on me. I still have an unhealed hole in my stomach."

"When shall we set off?" questioned An Kai, rubbing his chin.

Wen Fengjin turned to face him.

"Tomorrow."

"Good!"

Footnotes:

[1] lái la lǎodì: an Internet buzzword. A BBQ stall lady on Douyin uses this phrase to greet regular customers. It was grabbed from a Douyin user's video. Read more on Baidu.

[2] "Tears Behind Bars," a popular prisoner song by Chi Zhiqiang.

Translator:

Do you hate/pity Bai Yu?